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Dare to Love Me: Episodes 7-8

by starrygazer

Everything is a series of uncertainties and home truths for our leading couple this week, as the painful past comes full circle for our hero, thanks to a little nudge from our heroine. Can they come out of it and find a way back to each other…?

 
EPISODES 7-8

Things are icy cold every time Hong-do runs into Yoon-bok and she really misses him. He misses her too but the lost little boy inside is winning at the moment and Hong-do has just about had enough. She heads over to his place to confront him. Hong-do is so direct, and I love her for it! She asks Yoon-bok outright why is he being like this? Didn’t he say he wanted to be by her side whether it was a salty or sweet day?

It’s nice to see Yoon-bok realize his fear hurt her, and he tells her that he was wrapped up in his own emotion and did not think that it would hurt her. It’s adorable that he thinks he has no effect on her. Yoon-bok goes to change to apologize formally, and proceeds to throw himself on the ground at her mercy. I am chuckling to myself as Hong-do gets all irritated and asks him “Are you crying?!” and demands he gets up. Yoon-bok runs off to fetch her a cane to discipline him with – and now I’m crying laughing haha.

Hong-do baulks at this repayment method and asks him to grant her three wishes instead. Her first wish is for him to treat her rudely. To sit at a table with her, not walk behind her, and not to back away in the overly polite and awkward way he does. Yoon-bok is taking each term like a bullet to the chest he can’t believe his ears. It’s lovely to see this push and pull between them again this week.

Hong-do’s second wish is for them to go camping and for Yoon-bok to draw her. There’s a lot of uncomfortable close focusing and the Titanic flute music strikes again. After he does her portrait, Yoon-bok tells her he had fun and got to draw again because of her. This is such a sweet scene — it’s like they’re the only people there. And Hong-do using her wish to do something for Yoon-bok is just delightful.

Hong-do has acquired tickets to a webtoon festival and she wants to use this third wish as an excuse to take Yoon-bok. Unfortunately, on her way out she runs into an extremely distressed Yi-bok and ends up accompanying her to the hospital. Mum-bok has taken a turn for the worst. Mum obviously misses Yoon-bok terribly and asks Hong-do what Yoon-bok likes and it’s just adorable to see her enthusiastically telling them all about him.

So, instead of the festival, Hong-do texts Yoon-bok to meet her at the hospital, but he doesn’t know where he’s heading or why. When he arrives, he sees Hong-do with his mum and sister and stalks off without missing a beat. He is furious, sternly telling Hong-do she had no right to force him to come here when she doesn’t understand anything. He adds that she should stay out of his business from now on. I feel for Hong-do — she may have been wrong to mislead him, but she had the right intentions. Mum-bok is running out of time and he may regret not seeing her later on.

Hong-do does get to say her piece, though. She asks how long Yoon-bok is going to keep his guard up. Is he going to stay closed off for the rest of his life never letting anyone in? It’s a harsh truth, but someone needed to say it. Yoon-bok’s response is that he finds things easier this way. She asks him if it’s really that easy to ignore the people that love and worry about you, and says that no one can live completely alone. Although it’s hard, sometimes you have to worry, care, and try to understand each other. Isn’t that what happiness is all about?

But Yoon-bok challenges her, asking if being together really means being happy? To him, he has things to do, people to protect, and he can’t afford for his heart to waver. He cannot be tricked by the happiness of being together and neglect those things. Then he says he’s granted her three wishes, so she can leave him alone now. And once again poor Hong-do has to watch him walk away. It really is all or nothing with Yoon-bok; I’m really hoping we see him grow through this phase and start to accept not everything in the world is that cut and dry.

Our hero is struggling on his own. He is ignoring all calls from Hong-do, but does see a text from Yi-bok telling him that mum has very little time left. He goes over to the hospital to see his mum alone. Yoon-bok makes it clear how hurt he is that she avoided him, but he came to ask her why. Why did she abandon him? Does she know how much he waited for her? Yoon-bok makes it clear he has no intention of forgiving her and actually says “I’m abandoning you this time.” Poor mum (who is fake-sleeping) is shaking as a tear escapes her eyes; it’s just heart wrenching.

Shortly after, mum-bok passes away, and poor Yi-bok is distraught and all alone in the funeral hall, except for Hong-do. Yoon-bok — who received a notification call about his mother’s passing — arrives at the funeral hall to pay his respects and Yi-bok is pleased to see him. Of course, in true Yoon-bok style he pulls away from her and tells her he was merely fulfilling his last duty. Yi-bok asks him to wait as mum has left something for him. He begrudgingly takes the bundle and Yi-bok beseeches him to open it, not just discard it.

When he opens the bundle to find his baby keepsakes, pictures of him over the years, and a letter. Mum had written this after his visit to her when he abandoned her. She is full of sorrow and regret for hurting him and wants him to consider this her last wish: for him to listen – just this once.

Mum delves into the past and how she was not allowed to make any decisions for herself. Both of Yoon-bok’s parents had pleaded with Grandad Shin to open up Seongsan Village in order to give the children a chance to explore the world outside. And seeing how much pressure Yoon-bok was under to become the next leader broke mum’s heart. (Cut to: Grandad Shin caning Yoon-bok’s legs as a child for drawing and yelling at him for crying.) She just wanted her children to have some freedom.

Unfortunately, once Granddad Shin finally opened the village, the fire occurred and they lost Yoon-bok’s father. Grandad Shin held mum fully responsible and ordered her to leave the village as he could not trust her to raise his grandchildren. Harsh. Grandad Shin actually tells her “You killed my son!” Mum pleaded with him to let her take her children with her. He tells her she can’t, since he needs the next in line to run the village (Yoon-bok.) But he decides to be generous and let her take Yi-bok, but warns her never even think of seeking out Yoon-bok.

However, we see mum go back to the village gates and plead in all weathers to the point that Grandad Shin confronts her and tells her if she keeps this up she will never see Yoon-bok again. But, if she leaves and lives as if she never existed, never ever seeing or meeting Yoon-bok, when he inherits his duty, Grandad Shin will let her come back.

Mum thinks she is to blame for all of this and tells Yoon-bok in the letter that she had to lose him to get him back. She believes this is her punishment for leaving him behind and never being able to ask for his forgiveness. She says he doesn’t have to forgive her but she hopes he does not hate his only sister. And she sincerely wishes to see his face one last time. Promising to take all of his loneliness and pain with her when she leaves, she asks him to take down the walls he built around his heart because of her. Mum wants him to love freely and enjoy all the things he likes as much as he wants. She says her heart has always been with him. “Son, I love you. I mean, I loved you.” The sheer pain on Yoon-bok’s face is humbling as he crumbles at the realization that he was lied to his entire life, and regrets not giving her a chance to explain. (I think I need a moment).

Yoon-bok, full of hurt and anger, goes straight over to the village to see Grandad Shin. He asks him why he lied and said his mother abandoned him. Did he not know how much he missed his family? He would stay up every night counting, waiting for them. He couldn’t love or believe in anyone because of this. How could he be so cruel? (Well said!) Grandad Shin says the truth wouldn’t have changed anything (really?!) and that it’s Yoon-bok’s destiny to be the leader of the village. Well, Yoon-bok informs him he will not live like this anymore. He will live how his mum wanted him to live. Freely. He will not live the life Grandad Shin has planned for him. *Exit stage left*

After that fiasco, Yoon-bok wanders home in the rain — just as Hong-do is searching for him with a brolly. She has already been to his place to check on him and knows he’s not there and is without an umbrella. When she finds him, we have a mirroring moment from earlier on in the show, but this time she’s the one covering him. Yoon-bok asks her if she was waiting for him, and Hong-do says she was just worried since she doesn’t want him to get sick again. She hurries off, leaving the umbrella with him. But as the episode closes, Yoon-bok drops the umbrella, goes after her, and catches her in a back hug. *Squeals* More of this please!

We got swoony moment at the end, but our leading couple have had nothing but emotional distress this week. And I’m sure Hong-do is tired of seeing Yoon-bok walking away. Hopefully, after the revelation with his family, he’ll start to find his place in the world and grow to understand everything is not always black and white. (With our ever supportive heroine by his side, I have faith in our yin and yang couple to prevail.)

After all that angst this week, our light relief was derived from the side plots. Hong-hak and Yoon-ah cross paths again and he saves her from the impending Truck of Doom… that is really just a regular white truck in disguise as a Truck of Doom, as it actually just stops at the traffic light haha. Yoon-ah agrees to be his muse, because she doesn’t want Hong-hak to give up on his dream of being a webtoon artist, and these two are so smooshy and cute together.

As for our troublemaker, Camille is invited by Grandad Shin to come and stay at Seongsan Village to try and change the locals’ minds about the fashion show. If she can do it, he will open up the village to her. However, the locals are not impressed and try everything to make her leave — even hiding and grabbing her foot in the dark! (Hang on, I hope that was a ruse…)

 
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Tags: Dare to Love Me, L (Kim Myung-soo), Lee Yoo-young

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I have mixed feelings about Mum and Yi-bok. On one hand, mum was forced to leave though she prefered dying to being separated from her kids (Grandpa is the villain here), but it hurt me when she avoided Yoon-bok at the restaurant. The poor guy had no idea about all that. And instead of Yi-bok's uncomfortable clinging, she should have told him the truth. Not just Mum is ill, Mum never abandoned you.
Good intentions aren't an excuse for crossing a line or forcing people into doing things they want, I am sorry but I am sick and tired of this trope. Hong-do was wrong to call Yoon-bok to the hospital without telling him the truth and while she might be right about him closing off himself and building walls, her method was wrong.
Fortunately, the truth now revealed, Yoon-bok will now get to do what he wants and break the marriage with that annoying girl who is jumping for joy that she is marrying a man against his will just because she wants him as her spouse. What a toxic love! No, that isn't even love but obsession.

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I think evil grandpa seems more powerful than he actually is, especially for the members of Seongsan Village. Evil grandpa gave her an ultimatum, don’t make contact until Yoon-bok takes over Seongsan Village, otherwise she’ll never see him again. I think that’s why she ran from him at the restaurant, because she doesn’t know if Yoon-bok is being followed by evil grandpa’s henchmen. I agree the sister should’ve told him, but Yoon-bok seemed unwilling to listen to her

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I agree that Yoon-bok was unwilling to listen but instead of all this ranting about having no place to stay, I will only go away if you drag me, just say the words, or that is what I thought.
Good point on evil grandpa as I wonder what might have happened filed a custody lawsuit against him.

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It sounded like she dismissed his feelings instead to take them seriously. It was so stupid from her because they didn't have time to joke around.

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Much agreed. She thought of him as a young boy rebelling when he needed honesty and proper explanation.

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💯 this total lack of concern for Yoon-bok's feelings is what is more hurtful especially after the sister became a cop and was perhaps in a better position to challenge the grandpa.

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So true, "evil grandpa seems more powerful than he actually is".
Very astute observation. 👏👏👏

The people staying in the village are by default rather narrow-minded because their lack of exposure to the outside world. I wonder how was grandpa *allowed* to go to Paris and didn't he learn anything there!?

We all feel that mum and sister had many years to explain their point of view to Yoon-bok and their lack of explanation is galling. I don't know how pressured mom felt by grandpa or what she thought he would do if she defied his orders but in her mind it was her way of protecting both her children. Can't say I agree with this logic and Yoon-bok is right to feel abandoned. At least after the daughter became a cop they should have tried to contact Yoon-bok. Everyone grandpa, mom, sister and even Hong-do seem to have overlooked Yoon-bok's feelings in their misguided attempts to "protect" him.

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I feel bad for what the mom went through, but I agree, she could have still *explained* at least once what the situation was. Or Clingy Noona could have. Maybe Yi-bok could have had this realization before things got to this point.

But yeah, Hong-do imo was way out of line for just inserting herself into somebody else's family issues and not even considering Yi-bok's feelings. How is he supposed to know they "love and worry" about him when he couldn't even meet them?

Se-ryoung was born into and raised by the Joseon patriarchal system, so I can't blame her too much about the arranged marriage.

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What got me mad about Se-ryoung is her refusing to eat and having her father pressure evil grandpa into going through with the marriage. Yoon-bok was one step away from getting married to her.

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Yi-bok couldn't even give a clear explanation when calling off from work. Her mother is dying at the hospital and she says I have a situation at home. WTF. You are at the hospital watching your mother die. Tell your boss that.

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Thank you for the recap.

I too loved how upfront Hong-do was in addressing Yoon-bok's cold shoulder. The secondary couple also gets a chance to talk it out. Other dramas can do well to take notes on how to communicate and resolve misunderstandings!! 😂 👏👏

Yoon-bok's method of apologizing is as as heartfelt as Hong-do's punishment. I am shipping the couple more and more each week. 😊I know the three wishes that Hong-do wants genie Yoon-bok to grant may seem a bit too bossy and teacher-like i.e. for his own good. But I do hope the dynamics of their relationship will reach a more even keel as the learn to communicate more openly with each other and support each other and their dreams. The last scene had my full attention and I'm excited for next week.

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I get the titanic(ish) music now! When they were drawing each other it was so cuute!

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I liked that scene very much. I never expected that Hong-do would draw him too but it was a very nice touch. The way Yoon-bok was fidgeting was cute.

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The multiple betrayals and heartbreaks that Yoon-bok had to endure this week were heart-wrenching to watch.
- His face when he saw where Hong-do had called him.
- His reaction and abandonment of his mother.
- His stoic acceptance of his forced arranged marriage.
- His realization of the truth behind his mother and sister leaving Seongsan Village.
- His confrontation with his grandfather.

Ooof ... what an emotional rollercoaster this was for Yoon-bok. I do hope he can finally let go and live his life.

I loved the mutual portraits made by uri "yin and yang couple". Hope they take their talent further.

It was high time grandfather got called out for his regressive views. Hopefully the drama is heading towards a more progressive direction.

I didn't like Camille and the fake fiancée' stories at all this week. At least Yoon-ah and Hong-hak communicated.

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Evil Grandpa is something else, but most of the villagers seem to agree with him? Wild.

I actually felt bad for Camille. she's being bullied and ostracized by an entire village? :'(

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It was rather sad to watch. I want Camille to make the villagers and Grandpa eat crow.

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The very existence of the village requires a lot of suspension of disbelief. It's right next to the touristy part of the historical sightseeing attraction and yet none of the villagers choose to leave? They're not even curious about the way the rest of the world operates? (Surely they know a bit about it, unless Yeojoodaek is the only one sneakily watching YouTube.) What do they think when they see airplanes flying overhead? If someone gets sick, do they forgo modern medicine? Not really expecting a lot of answers to be forthcoming ... but at least Yoon-bok's eyes have been opened and he no longer feels beholden to his grandfather (or grandfather's agenda).

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I'm taking the village as a shorthand for patriarchy. I too don't expect the drama to come up with any logical or even reasonable explanation beyond that.
I'm looking forward to see how they would react to Camille's fashion show because obviously she'll convince them. 😅

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I'm wondering how in the cult they run businesses there if they don't give the customer what they ask for. I'm just like Camile. If you don't want to give me my coffee, at least put some milk and sugar in that tea. 

No idea why they even asked her what she wanted if they were going to just get offended by whatever order she made. They literally had coffee on the menu and decided not to give it to her. 

They're as annoying as grandpa. They all deserve each other. 

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I think milk and sugar are not put in green tea. 🙃 I think there was some miscommunication also about coffee. But I agree they treated her shockingly for a customer. Could it be that no outsiders are allowed in the village without the express permission of grandpa or Yoon-bok. Maybe that is why the village folk don't know how to deal with them.

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You can put milk and sugar on anything.

The problem was that Camile was using English words and modern terms. She said coffee in English, and that's why the woman couldn't understand her.
But later she corrected herself and said the Korean (maybe older?) term for it.

But the ahjummas said the "recommended" menu would be green tea, because they're good at it.
Camile dislikes it but asked for it because she didn't want to make the woman angrier, and was supposed to get friendly with people in the village.

But then she asked for milk and sugar and she got kicked out because it disrespects tea or wtv. As if they weren't the ones forcing her to drink it.

I don't think it's about the haraboji. I think everyone in that village is just the worst. LOL

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For now apart from Yeo Joo Daek and Yoon-ah I don't like anybody in the village. I

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My understanding is that after the fire of 17 years ago where Yoon-bok’s father died the village has been closed to the public per Gramps orders.

Re Camille. So far we have seen very little actual ‘designing’ going on by either Hong-do and Camille.
I don’t know exactly what she is trying to sell to the villagers.

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@marcusnyc20 So true. Hong-do did more *work* in her previous job as a gofer. I think Camille wants to hold a fashion show in the village. Which makes zero sense actually but let's see if the drama offers any explanation apart from - just because. 🙄

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Maybe the drama is trying to make us sympathize with mon and sis but I'm not buying that either.

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I felt bad for the mom as an individual/woman because of what haraboji did to her. But I don't feel bad for her broken relationship with Yoon Bok.
Like, Idk, report the kidnapping of your son?
Our at least talk to him?
Just do something.

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💯 Agreed. Also have they forgotten the sis is cop for crying out loud. Why did she not do anything!?

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Instead of crying to haraboji for a hundred nights or whatever, she should've gone to the police for kidnapping, ask for legal custody, get a restriction order, just something.

I think waiting for the sis to grow up would've been a bit much. But it would've made sense that her first mission as a police officer was to destroy Seongsan, not protect it. They literally kidnapped her brother.
At least sue the place?

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Has the village leadership brainwashed everyone into thinking they lose their legal/civil rights as Korean citizens as soon as they walk into it? Or are viewers just supposed to accept that it exists outside not only time and modern culture but any other legal framework?

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@enriquequierecagar @Elinor
What initially seemed like a cute premise for the ML has been taken to ridiculous lengths. If the drama's intention was to critique the Joseon village it is not coming out clearly. Then there is the (now sidelined) mystery of the fire, Yoon-bok's father and art theft. Are we to believe the art theft has been going on for 17 years!?

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I haven't paid any attention to the art theft subplot, because, even if Joon Ho is stealing from them I'm okay with it. 😂😂

The boy grew up as a slave in the 21st century, he can burn the village down and I wouldn't care.

What shocks me is that he's the only one that wants revenge when Yoon Bok's mom and sis also had to suffer a lot because of that place.

Tbh, I don't care about them. I just want the main siblings to make the Yoon duo impolite enough so they can go on double dates or something.

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I don't really care about things in this drama 😅

The grandpa is an idiot living in his dreamy patriarchy. He had no rights to go to the funeral.
The sister was completely stupid from the beginning. She imposed her to her brother like it was a joke when she could just tell him the whole truth. She was not protecting him, neither the mum or the grandpa. She lied to him about her job too.
The mum could have told him the truth too before being sick? What was the point when it was too late? And as a mum, the grandpa didn't have right on her son. So I don't understand why she left him behind.

I'm really sorry for Yoon-Bok who is surrended by idiots who don't know anything about family. I just hope Hong-do and him will be happy at the end.

I don't care about the brother and the bodyguard neither Camille and her business.

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I absolutely loved episode 7, it was full parody, I laughed at the dramatic angst! And lol at the ToD being a normal white truck that follows road rules 😂
Enjoying all the couples, crossing my fingers that Joon-ho and Yi-bok might develop some feelings too😉

Yeah I wasn’t surprised evil Grandpa was the reason why Yoon-bok’s sister and mother left. And he literally lied to Yoon-bok that they abandoned him. What makes it more ridiculous is that evil grandpa dares to give the surprised pikachu face as if his actions didn’t cause emotional damage, to not just Yoon-bok but his sister and mother as well. I don’t care for his justifications and please show don’t give him a redemption arc. Anyway I literally clapped when Yoon-bok confronted him and left Seongsan Village!

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The TOD parody was so funny!! Especially because I believed 100% that this is the kind of drama that would use a TOD 😂 I want Joon-ho and Yi-bok as our third couple, too.

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Thank you for the recap @starrygazer! I'm watching this drama and really enjoying it. It's so old-school and comforting in it's familiarity with plot beats. I'm looking forward to Yoon-bok figuring out that his devotion to Hong-do is actually romantic, not scholastic. The reveals of backstory and emotions this week were really effective. I feel sorry for Yoon-bok that he has to live with the regret of not clearing things up with his mom when he had the chance. Ugh and that old poop blaming Yoon-bok's mom for his son's death... she literally couldn't have been any further away from the fire, sir. AND now it looks like that old hypocrite might get his own second chance romance and open up the village for Camille... oh well, I don't care about him as long as Yoon-bok gets to decide his own future and happiness.

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Ok, so I had a whole angry paragraph typed out initially but I deleted it bc by the end of episode 8... I actually kind of liked the story? And the acting? And ML's character? Like, I'm sad this isn't the stress free romcom I was expecting, but it kinda works as a melo / healing kinda drama... I guess.

I was genuinely impressed by the ML's acting in EP. 8, especially the scenes in the rain, the funeral, reading the letter, standing up to Evil Grandpa, etc. the direction, music, the cinematography was also quite inspired imo.

Other notes: 1) Why is the ajumma/ajusshi romance kinda sweet?
2) when I'm in a "get involved in someone else's business" competition and my opponent is Hong-do
3) how is the webtoon guy the better Kim sibling? Look at him respecting Yoon-ah's choice (somewhat)
4) it's not out of the question that there's someone behind Joseon Grandpa too, someone who forced him into doing these things... but he's still kind of an awful person, yeah?
5) Also, legally speaking, can an evil grandpa keep a mom from seeing her kids?

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From @starrygazer’s recap,

“So, instead of the festival, Hong-do texts Yoon-bok to meet her at the hospital, but he doesn’t know where he’s heading or why. When he arrives, he sees Hong-do with his mum and sister and stalks off without missing a beat. He is furious, sternly telling Hong-do she had no right to force him to come here when she doesn’t understand anything. He adds that she should stay out of his business from now on.”

My response to Yoon-bok: “D*mn straight”. Talk about noble idiocy.

Hong-do got bamboozled by Shin Yi-bok over a few beers after she learned Yi-bok was noona and not love competition. She got way in over her head with this family. Yi-bok had plenty of time to come clean with Yoon-bok but declined to do so. For crying out loud mom on her death bed pretended to be asleep when she could have easily opened her eyes and reached out to him.
After reading the belated letter I am glad Yoon-bok confronted gramps back at the village. He is still on a mission and that is to solve the mystery of his father’s death.

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It was uncomfortable watching everybody *tip-toeing* around the truth and making obtuse remarks to Yoon-bok instead of one single line of truthful explanation.

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Mum and Yi-bok had multiple ways and time to explain why they left the way they did. I don't blame him one bit for not forgiving either of them.

But I don't buy this entire situation to begin with. It's written with too many holes in it and sloppy. There are way too many ways to communicate once she left the village and knew he was leaving the village from time to time also. They access to cell phones, email. And we are expected to believe neither she nor her husband had any trusted allies in the village. Why couldn't the sister open her damn mouth.

And grandpa's hat has been pissing me off for a while now.

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It's now more understandable on the part of the mother why she did what she did. I can't see what good reason the sister didn't try to be a bit more truthful though.

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