Would You Rather #40
by DaebakGrits
In dramaland, leading ladies often find themselves torn between the love of two equally attractive men — a choice none of us would want to make! But what if you did have to pick between the frustrating lawyer and the adorkable police officer? In this weekly feature, we ask you to make the difficult decisions — and we aren’t limiting our options to dreamy oppas.
Vote via the poll and feel free to use the comments to explain exactly how you were able to choose! So, Beanies:
WOULD YOU RATHER #39 RESULTS
Based on the responses in the comment section, the last prompt was practically a gimmie, as 69% of voters opted to live with the insufferable in-laws because, well, it had the higher survival rate. A psycho is still a psycho — even if he does have a pretty face. Although, @britney isn’t a huge fan of Lee Dong-wook’s face, which is why she wasn’t even remotely tempted by the prospect of living with him. For others, who may have been more attracted to the dramaland veteran, the choice was more a matter of living accommodations: mansion or dorm. And well, in that case, it really is no contest because, as @lillamy stated, the roomy mansion makes it easier to avoid the undesirables, which is “impossible in a dorm.” Plus, you know, mansions are nicer.
That isn’t to say, though, that no one picked that dorm life with Lee Dong-wook. According to the vote, 31% of would take your chances with the psycho. According to @ceciliedk, he’s “just one person” compared to a whole family of potential whackos, and unlike the in-laws, there’s no obligation to pretend like you like Lee Dong-wook. Whereas, any conflict with the in-laws would also cause friction with your spouse. And sure, a mansion is large, but @romanticidiot suspects a bunch of insufferable in-laws would make mansion “seem small.” And if you’re uncomfortable in social settings, like @darkcc, then avoiding a psycho is preferable to suffering through social obligations with the in-laws.
Overall, while the mansion and in-laws were the clear winners, I found the reasoning behind those who picked psycho Lee Dong-wook much more interesting — just not interesting enough to convince me to go back to that dorm life.
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Tags: Would You Rather
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1 🌸 Cera (@Seeker) 🌸
May 1, 2024 at 5:31 AM
Well I already have a zero filter. So I'm up for saving Sun-Jae any time of the day or year. 😅🙋♀️❤
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Elinor, Team Glasses team co-captain
May 1, 2024 at 8:52 AM
I have no filter, because I've reached a point in my life where I have nothing to lose by speaking my mind - but I also have no favorite idol. I picked the first option because it requires the lowest energy input on my part.
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🌸 Cera (@Seeker) 🌸
May 1, 2024 at 9:39 AM
Frankly Speaking it may
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2 Cecee is done DramaQueening
May 1, 2024 at 5:41 AM
Being the first person to vote, I briefly thought everyone agreed with me when I noticed that 100% of the votes were for the zero filter option... I felt like I had unlocked the magical door to social interaction... But no, it turns out that I am the one agreeing with me, which is still worthy of celebrating because it's not always the case.
I'd rather go with zero filter. Why zero filter? I think the most obvious answer is: Why the hell not? Imagine just how liberating it must feel to say exactly what you're thinking at all times. Unlike the popular fils and drama representation, I don't necessarily believe it's going to be a constant source of problems—unless you have a better poker face than me. Typically, people know when I don't like something or someone.
For a start, not all unfiltered thoughts are offensive. Just because you are not saying it aloud, it doesn't mean that it's going to rude. Most of the filter we apply on ourselves is not to avoid saying the truth, but to avoid saying everything we think at all times. We have on average over 6,000 thoughts per day. We don't say everything that goes through our mind aloud (I would exclude my elderly aunt from this because she literally says everything aloud and has not shut up in over 80 years)
Yet, is it necessarily bad to share all those little thoughts? It could be a fantastic advancement for mental health and neurodiversity understanding. What pushed a depressed person to wanting to die? Why does an autistic person need time to recharge after making one phone call? How can someone have a panic attack in the middle of a safe office? You could know if you could listen to all their thoughts. Honestly, as someone who's been sitting lonely and undiagnosed on the side of the neurodivergent fence for decades, it would have been amazing to be able to share my unfiltered thoughts with someone. Your thoughts are your inner logic, so people not calling younger me broken or abnormal because they can finally observe my brain's thought path... That would have been bliss!
Just imagine the power of unfiltered spoken thoughts: We could prevent suicides, we could spot dementia in its early tracks, we could do so much!
So yay, for unfiltered thoughts all day long everyday.
The second aspect of no-filter, and the one that is the main source of worries, is about saying things you wouldn't want others to hear.
But, here again, I am coming from the socially inept neurodivergent side. It would help me a lot to know what people think of me. Sure, it won't be pleasant at all times. But I can't always guess what you are not telling me.
if you say you are fine but are crying yourself to sleep, I can't help if I don't know.
If you are nice to me but hiding that you dislike me, I have no way of knowing from your behaviour.
If you are flirting by throwing a bunch of euphemisms at me with heavy winking, I will never get what you are getting at. I need to know for clarity...
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Cecee is done DramaQueening
May 1, 2024 at 6:10 AM
[continued because as usual I write too much]
I need to know for clarity because, bae, if you are suggesting to come to your place for ramyeon, I would normally assume that you want to feed me. I say normally because K-dramaland has taught me that you may not have the slightest intention of giving me food (and that is truly distressful because I might have brought my favourite chopsticks for the occasion). But anyway, you get what I mean. I can't read your thoughts and while I can guess some elements based on context, the truth is that my interpretation of the context and yours could be miles apart. So anyway, do you have some veggie Jin Ramyeon?
Will all those unfiltered thoughts be nice to hear? 100% not. Some will hurt more than others. I won't be completely fine knowing your thoughts. But I will certainly be better off knowing than not knowing. You wouldn't like all of my thoughts either. But this isn't the point. It's not about choosing what the tell others to please them and make them care more about ourselves. It is about keeping communication clear, effective, and somehow less nervously taxing because: How fucking hard is it to be pleasant when you hate someone's guts? How excruciating does it feel to have to smile through passive-aggressive jokes? How painful is it to make small talk with someone when you only wanted to ask one purposeful question?
Enter no-filter, and ta-da, I can wave goodbye to all those painful interactions.
Finally, I want to connect with you. I want to get to know the real you in all its complexity, with your fears, your self-doubts, your hopes, your pains, your despairs, your dreams, your everything. I want to hear the real you. You can peel all your layers, your thoughts are safe with me. (this is the most flirtatious thing I have written here; I assure you I did not mean those layers).
I hope you too want to hear the real, unfiltered me.
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Healer’s
May 1, 2024 at 6:39 AM
I would love the unfiltered you, Cecee <3
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Seon-ha
May 1, 2024 at 7:15 AM
I love that Cecee has a favorite set of chopsticks. I have a favorite set of Korean-shaped, long-handled spoons too, my friend. I'll bring my implements to dinner if you bring yours!
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Healer’s
May 1, 2024 at 8:08 AM
I've been thinking hard about it and so disappointed that I don't even have a couple of favourite things to bring along 😅
Seon-ha
May 1, 2024 at 8:15 AM
Can you do the cooking, Claire? I mean, the actual bonafide rameyon that we're really eating and not just using as a metaphor for sexy-times, because you know, food is also important.
I mean that poor noodle soup!!! No one can just enjoy it for who it is?? It always has to be in service of some other meaning??! So sad. 🤣🍲😢
Healer’s
May 1, 2024 at 8:39 AM
Ah, cooking rameyon for real eating purposes, that I can do (pretty well). I'm not sure about using it for sexy-times though, not that you'd ask me to do it 🤣
🌸 Cera (@Seeker) 🌸
May 1, 2024 at 9:43 AM
💯 Yes Cecee ... we Always want to hear the unfiltered you.
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Kodra aka Qanon something
May 1, 2024 at 7:33 AM
You know I do!
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emsel
May 1, 2024 at 8:30 AM
Cecee, I see the unfiltered you in your writings because the explanation was beautiful.
On a lighter note why can't you just write down your thoughts and hand them over to the other person?
Random person: Hi
Cecee: *furiously scribbles that she is confused as to why this random person is talking to her*
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Cecee is done DramaQueening
May 1, 2024 at 8:57 AM
*Running after strangers in the street, while waving A2 cardboard paper at them*
"Did you say hi to me?"
"Do we know each other and I didn't recognise you? Sorry!"
"What do you need from me?"
"BTW I totally love your shoes, bae"
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emsel
May 1, 2024 at 9:35 AM
😂😂😂 That random compliment. I do it too as an unflitered person and people wonder if I am genuinely nice or just scarcastic. So you ain't missing much on the unfilter.
tabong
May 1, 2024 at 12:27 PM
I feel like this is the beauty and pain of communication.
I like people that are simple minded, direct, or straightforward, or people that articulate things carefully, etc. I like the diversity, but it's hard to communicate when we're all so different, right?
So I feel like the real utopia would be for people to actually understand (ask) how to speak with each individual in their life.
I don't want to hear anyone's thought process, because what I say is not really the result of what I think. I overthinking everything and have the most random thoughts cross my mind. So actually saying what's on my mind would be insane. 😂 But asking someone how to treat them is something that I would gladly do.
Most people around me are the "if you don't tell me I won't know" type, while I'm of the "If you know me, you should know" type. And knowing that makes it easier for me, to know how to express myself to them (even if I don't actually say what I think, because most of the time what I think is that I have to repeat myself all the time to them LOL).
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3 Kodra aka Qanon something
May 1, 2024 at 5:47 AM
Hmm, if I go to trouble of saving my idol will I get the whole reward package? At least I will get ep. 8 you all know what? For that I will run lovely in an infinite loop. 🤣
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Bunny Sonaki
May 1, 2024 at 7:09 AM
I will get ep 8 minus the last 10 minutes😂😂😂😂
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Kodra aka Qanon something
May 1, 2024 at 7:25 AM
But that will get me to get another one of those first time kisses, Bunny! Let him die again and again, I say! 🤣🤣🤣
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Bunny Sonaki
May 1, 2024 at 7:40 AM
Makes sense 😂😂😂
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4 Seon-ha
May 1, 2024 at 5:50 AM
LOL. My first thought was OMG!!! To actually get to say what I think all the time would be amaaaaaazing. Trick is--they'd still have to accept me for who I am, but, whatever, this is "Would You Rather Fantasyland," so...they would!
Imagine how freeing that would be!! I could use all that energy put to second-guessing the appropriateness of what I'm about to say to better use--like, oh, I don't know, solving global climate problems or, I guess, inventing time travel for everyone else who picked that option??
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Cecee is done DramaQueening
May 1, 2024 at 6:12 AM
You totally need to redirect your energy to time travel. If going no-filter is the way, this is a risk worth taking!
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5 Bunny Sonaki
May 1, 2024 at 7:08 AM
After seeing what Sol is going through to save Seon-jae, I would rather have no filter. 😂😂😂
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6 Britney
May 1, 2024 at 7:28 AM
I would choose the time travel not to save an idol cause I don't care or like anyone that much but for the memory loss and potentially different choices I would make.
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7 Britney
May 1, 2024 at 7:35 AM
Technically, people *could* say whatever they want without a filter if they truly wanted to, they would just have to deal with the consequences of it.
And social media shows that people do it all the time under the cover of anonymity or screen names.
Maybe I'm confused about the exact details of the "no filter". Like would you have to say any and every passing thought or is it responding to situations (like if you suspect someone is lying to you and you call them out on it/curse them out no matter the surroundings)
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8 Gum Shoe
May 1, 2024 at 7:35 AM
For me, the choice is clear as I would save a life. For me, and I am only speaking for me, a filter is good because I have the right to and can speak my mind. Being a non-physically violent person, the biggest blows for good and bad I have dealt have been with my words. The filter is a necessary tool for me--it allows me to not just speak what I feel in the moment, but also consider why I might be wanting say something (which might be because of my hurt or anger about something else) and the possible consequences of my words. I have regretted saying things reflexively in the moment, not considering why someone was saying what they were saying and why I was feeling what I was feeling, which may not have matched what my words were. The filter gives me a moment to reflect and consider, and if I still want or need to say something I will. My filter on a good day is a tool for me to have discernment, empathy, sympathy and clarity in using my words, and I value it.
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9 Blue (@mayhemf)
May 1, 2024 at 7:43 AM
I already have zero filter in real life, most of the times and I am doing reasonably fine. I don't have idol's that i care about, so that is not an option for me.
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10 DancingEmma
May 1, 2024 at 7:49 AM
I like most of my students but have to hold my tongue with a minority of them who are irritating, entitled and spoiled offspring of no doubt similarly afflicted parents so having no filter with zero repercussions would be such a gift!
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11 Lord Cobol (Kdramas, like water, flow downhill)
May 1, 2024 at 8:06 AM
Hmmmm.... A tough one.
One mitigating factor for having no filter is that if it causes too many problems with other people I can just stay home and watch kdramas. Or become an internet troll :)
Do I get to meet Kang Han-na?????
Before I decide on the time travel I want to read the fine print. Do I have 10 years of alternate memories to replace the ones I lost? If I forget 10 years of my past that's probably going to mess with my job performance far more than what we've seen in the show. Meanwhile, does the idol know I've saved her? Is she grateful?
Exactly howgrateful???What do her fans think and does their reaction cause her problems? What if she turns out to be unlikeable once I get to know her?And oh wait -- What favorite? I'd have to find an idol I actually care about first.
Guess I'll still vote time travel, but mostly out of pure cussedness. It's trailing in the poll now and I might as well keep things close. And there is the old theory that if everybody really understood everyone else and knew what they were thinking about each other the result would be roughly one survivor per continent.
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lillamy
May 2, 2024 at 11:16 AM
I think the no filters thing work if you strictly stick to your own company, orders everything from the internet to be delivered to your door-step, and most importantly: only ever communicate with your boss though email.
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12 emsel
May 1, 2024 at 8:23 AM
I am already a person with no-filter and I would still choose it over time travel because I don't want to go through those obstacles again.
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13 Miky
May 1, 2024 at 10:03 AM
I'll take the second if i can have Sun Jae !!!!
I know i'm very shameless but i don't care this time!
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🌸 Cera (@Seeker) 🌸
May 1, 2024 at 7:23 PM
Ah! no, not at all!! Sun-Jae is tempting enough to make Sol out of many of us. ♥️
Carry on Miky!
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14 jillian
May 1, 2024 at 10:12 AM
Since I love Lovely Runner, I chose saving Sun Jae! ☺️
Filter schmilter, what is that? 🤣
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🌸 Cera (@Seeker) 🌸
May 1, 2024 at 7:24 PM
Hehehe ... 👍👌👏
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15 welh
May 1, 2024 at 10:20 AM
It took me a while to realize living an unfiltered life is better than than holding back on the unreal expectations of others. I voted
"Have zero filter and say exactly what’s on your mind" because I can say things diplomatically.
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16 abalyn
May 1, 2024 at 11:01 AM
I am a school teacher, and I couldn’t do my job without a filter. It’s not just that I hold back my gut responses to student snarkiness, but it’s that the teacher role requires you to look past the defense mechanism and address the other issues. Which makes me wonder if I kept myself in a more meta state mentally, could you have some control? I doubt the lovely non-liar show will address this, but I am curious if you could control your mouth by controlling your thoughts if you have no filter.
However, my evolution as a teacher has all happened in the last ten years, so if I went back for an idol I would have forgotten it all. Either option I would give it up. I would love to have a conversation with RM, as I think he has a beautiful mind and he also loves contemporary art. Yet, I don’t think I would give up my life’s work for that. I think I will have to think of altering my mental state to control my mouth. I have been thinking I should do more meditation anyways. I also speak my mind a lot more than I used to anyways.
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17 tabong
May 1, 2024 at 12:06 PM
Say exactly what's on your mind?
People will hear all my overthinking or what? It takes me ages to come to a conclusion. And my thought process is weird af. Too bad for the people who would listen to me. 😂
I usually say what is in my mind, but the process to get to the actual words is really messy.
And I also usually say nothing when I'm annoyed or sad. Because it's exhausting or I need to calm down. So I just let it go, or organize my thoughts and just speak once.
So I feel like this would be equally exhausting for me. Having to say everything.
When you talk, you get an answer. And that makes you talk more. But sometimes you don't need to give or receive an answer. In my case, that's 50% of most interactions.
It's kinda draining just the thought of having to say everything, when half of my communication is through silence.
Also, I don't want to know what other people think. Most of the time, I say "why people don't stop talking?" And I say that, including myself. 🤣
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18 Babylilo
May 1, 2024 at 12:59 PM
Many people have told me that I'm "very direct." Some have even said that they find my directness intimidating. But I know when it's best to keep my thoughts to myself. Left completely unfiltered, I would most likely end up friendless and reviled, and cause a lot of pain to people who didn't deserve it at all.
I wouldn't mind losing ten years of memory—in fact, I'd love the opportunity for a "do-over." The only problem is that I'm not an "idol-worshipper," so there wouldn't be anyone in particular I'd want to save. Could I save someone other than an idol?
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19 Diana Hansen
May 1, 2024 at 7:40 PM
I've been practicing how to hold my tongue from saying blunt things all my life so I would like a chance to go back in time and save my idol. My devotion is so strong, it just might break through that forgetting stuff and have my memory come back to me so I know just why I am there in the first place!
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20 ar_arguably romantic
May 1, 2024 at 8:03 PM
Sort of a hard one, since I treasure my memories too.
I need my filter! Other people need my filter. Dark thoughts already spill out sometimes already. They don't need a flood. Or have to hear even more of the ditzy things I've done or thought that make them worry and question how I'm still a functioning human being. And I already dwell on feeling bad when I say something that I feel like could have possibly offend someone.
I guess that leaves me with saving a favorite idol and forgetting the last 10 years. At least I will get to save a life.
I don't think I've ever idolized a kpop idol for that long. I like them for a few years and then move on or like multiple ones at the same time with equal amounts of affection. I don't have that sort of loyalty in me!
Then again, I've never been on the verge of suicide and had an idol convince me to want to live.
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21 redfox
May 2, 2024 at 1:40 AM
I already have zero filter. Time travel? hmm. I dont trust time travel. I believe in unknown consequences & ripple effect so I think it is a bad idea
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22 lillamy
May 2, 2024 at 11:06 AM
An idol now is an idol for a reason and I'm not sure that reason stands ten years ago so I'm not sure I'd care. But then again, ten years ago I was carrying my first-born and had reduced my already sparse filters in favour of hormones.
So, meeting my idol with practically no filters, then?
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23 Amany
May 3, 2024 at 5:07 AM
Normally I tell what I want to tell (unfiltered)- on my own way- otherwise I activate the “silent mode” , so time travel saving an idol or anyone would be a perfect option just for the sake of forgetting the last 10 years 😎
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