I find faking an affair to get Ha-ra to divorce him was so cruel, even crueler than a real affair. I agree that their marriage life was suffocating with Ha-ra being in control of everything, something she admitted to in the present. Still, Eun-bum could have either voiced his opinion much earlier or could have just said I can't take it anymore, let's get divorced. Much better than the fake affair scheme.

I agree with you @missvictrix. The drama is better of being a story about how a former couple learns to move on and become strangers again. I know both sides have lingering feelings but sometimes love alone isn't enough to make a relationship succeed.

The custody case is thought-provoking. The mother had postpartum depression but not only did the father not help take care of the child but also he assaulted the mother. Anyone in her place could have thought of running away from such an abusive husband but the point is they have a child. So either take your child with you or stay away from them to the end.

I don't know about you but suddenly appearing in a child's life is confusing and turns their life upside down. I know being abandoned brings excruciating pain but perhaps the confusion they will live in might make it worse.

Also, showing up after all of those years is greed. I know the situation was more than the mother could handle but one should bear the consequences of their choices.

Last week I said I was in “Team Cheat” and I thought I wouldn’t like any other thing, but I actually liked the turn we had this week. Surely, it was cruel, but I get the position Eun Beom was in. The flashbacks were so revealing… he forgot about himself, at some point he was just pleasing HaRa as she took everything from granted from him. Then he was so suffocated that he saw no other chance even if hw knew that would hurt HaRa, because at that moment he was just too exhausted to say “let’s talk”. When he told HaRa “you wouldn’t have let me go” she realised she wouldn’t have… I’m not saying Eun Beom did right, because he should have talked to her and explained her feelings, and faking an affair was cruel, but the fact that in SK a divorce is not possible unless both parts agree… it’s crazy. So what I’m saying here is that I understand both of them. Now, if Eun Beom has found happiness in being single, as CEO Seo asked, is another question.

This drama keeps making me apply suspension of disbelief in everything court / legal related, so I won’t comment on anything related (because if I do I would drop the drama 😂).

I also love HaRa and Jae Gyeom together and I really hope they are end game. I mean, he’s not just being the Nice Guy who expects to be loved just by being nice. He is a supportive friend and is being so honest about how he feels… I would really hate to see him suffer.

Hum...

I kinda found Eun-bum's reasons valid. Yes, he could have tried to talk or couple therapy, but he was kinda depressed. But it was their stupid law that made him lie to her.

I don't understand how people can decide to have a baby without real discussions before like what education they want to give? How they will manage their time? Etc.

Their case was a complete mess. Ha-Ra shouldn't have the right to take the case in the first place. It didn't make any sense.

Then, the father hit his wife and it was not really well adressed... Just one time is a pretty bad excuse... He lied about his daughter and the fact she doesn't want to spend time with her mother. She wouldn't have been curious about the phone call.

Ha-Ra couldn't do anything against her client's decision to take his daugther, she was bound by professional secrecy. But she was wrong to take the case.

I don't understand why it's so hard to accept a shared custody for the sake of their daughter.

I hope the drama will use the title as a purpose! They need to live on their own.

Thank you, @missvictrix, for the weecap! I think Eun-bum felt demeaned by him taking over the house chores while Ha-ra is the sloppy one (we saw how her apartment looked like when Jae-gyeom came to visit). They're lawyers, both working, but he couldn't even relax at home because his wife kept on 'bulldozing' his preferences. He may or may not have noticed it during the years they were going out but, yes, honey, the partnership sometimes changes after the wedding.

"Although we all live talking about love, but in truth we don't know how to achieve it" I love, love the dialogues in this drama and the heart felt conversations they show between the characters, especially the advices Hong Yeo Rae gives.

Ep 4 was a difficult watch not because they dealt with a heavy theme, but because the "married life" scenes flared my anxiousness of marriage in real life. I am at an age in a patriarchial and conservative country where the marriage pressure is suffocating me, so when the ML spoke of marriage during his dinner with the CEO and Kwon Si Wook, it resonated a lot with me because if you are afraid to make adjustments and commitments then it ruins the life of not just one, but two people.

Also, I am in the minority of not liking the SML because I feel he is obsessed with Ha Ra even though his personlity has been nothing short of great. I think most of it has got to do with all of his scenes revolving around the FL and not showing enough of his background or life outside of their dates.

Uhm finally there's one said the ultimate truth, "perhaps marriage is not for everyone." 😏
I look for this writer's other works, she/he has things to say.

First of all, yay! we all one 50 points for guessing he didn't actually cheat.
We're drama experts, DB's staff should take that into consideration and change our levels (yeah, I'm tired of being an errand dude).

Second, I'm going to be the devil's advocate here: I understand Goo's POV and I think he has a point.
He was just being consistent with his personality and perspective.

I know that communication is key and all, but you only talk when there's someone to listen.
To fix things you need the other person's cooperation.

If he was (1) scared of his wife and (2) felt like she couldn't compromise and understand him, then his actions make sense.
Personally, I don't find anything more frustrating than talking to someone but feeling like I've said nothing. When someone can't (or won't) put in your position, you can take a step back and save your energy.

I think is sad that she never thought about his actions and responses. I know communication is key, but did he had to spell everything for her? Did she ever think how her actions affected him?
"Oh, he wants to watch this movie, maybe I should just let him watch it"? "oh, he likes cleaning first. I'll take note for next time"? "Maybe we should discuss about the air conditioner at night"?
I know some people don't give that much thought to things, but damn.

Tbh, it's exhausting to be around people seems to not consider you. And it's even worse if you feel like you can't voice your needs because that person has power over you or because your scared of them.

I'm pretty sure this guy would've end up voluntarily mute instead of speaking up. He did right asking for a divorce.

It's sad that Oh blames herself, tho, she shouldn't. 😔 Actually, I was kind of surprised with her reaction, I thought she was going to be angry.

I think he said he cheated because he didn't want to fight, or blame her, or actually tried to fix something that for him wasn't right. For him it was the "best" choice, even if it cost his reputation, money and her heart.

So... this two should NEVER get back together.
I mean, from her POV it doesn't make sense to comeback with him because damn, what perspective this dude has of her to not be able to talk to her about those stuff. And well, he broke her heart in a million of pieces.
From his perspective they are incompatible and he doesn't has the energy to try to make it compatible. Plus, he totally broke her heart twice, so unless he's a psycho he should leave her alone.

🤷‍♀️

Oh, btw, I hate the kid's parents. They needed to wait until the kid got physically hurt to start thinking what's best for her? F off.

Well, see you on another drama beanies. I'm out. Good luck with this.

Ouch. Ouch. and Ouch.

Did not see that coming. Surprised the show went here. And glad it did.

Being tired of marriage and not feeling like you are an equal in the relationship can be tiring. And if he truly felt that he couldn’t talk to his wife about it, it’s sad. It probably was already a failing marriage or he didn’t want to put any effort into communicating to make it work.

I think it’s a good closure for her to move on. It’s going to take her time to heal from this and trust another person or even herself to get into another relationship. She needs time.

I really hope they don’t Bring them back together.

Also, did they talk about another child towards the end? Why do I feel like there is something more he is hiding.

This two episodes changed everything. When the reason for jumping into something becomes the reason for wanting out, I know that it is best they step back and take a while to reassess. I quite understand Eun-beom's point of view and freaking feel for him. I also get it to the end if that is the reason he made a decision to not have a kid with Ha-ra, leaving his likely Eun-byul trauma out of it. It'll kill him inside and he won't want to voice out. He couldn't help but watch as everything was tearing apart and didn't speak up for the same reason - things tearing and falling apart. And that's where I'll pick a pickle with him. It just had to be one conversation. If Mr. A has always known you to yield for them and all of a sudden you start standing your ground, they'll know that something is up, and with the kind of person Ha-ra is shown to be - she knows how to take a back seat and reassess things - , would they have turned out that way.
And even if they divorced because it is a big issue for him, the reasons would be clear. She now realizing that the divorce was as a result of him always having to yield to her strong will, one of the very things he loved about her is devastating and unfair. It's no longer a case of would she have worked on it if I told her or not. He knew she could get really ferocious and scary whenever they fought, it's a case of letting her know that he has had it up to here and can't take it anymore, whether or not she becomes a scary cat during the conversation. It could have been a wakeup call for her...or not. But at least she wouldn't be made a fool for 3 solid years.

I'm glad it wasn't an affair that caused their divorce. I'm glad that it was a personality issue. And I'm looking forward to how this information being out there in the open changes the dynamics and rocks the boat.

Talking about the romances, I like Jae-gyum and I like him with Ha-ra as much as I like Ha-ra and Eun-beom back. I'll be delighted with whatever she chooses as an endgame. I just want his level of fine understanding is not as a result of personal trauma. I want it to just be him giving his personal opinion and not talking from experience. It was his perspective that made me see things clearer about Seo-hee's husband's point of view and he scores points for that.

Eun-beom and Ki Seo-hee...I'm not sure I'm digging this one even though I know he cares for her and it seems like she is into him. Or was my eyes deceiving me. I do look how Jang Seung-jo's eyes spoke volumes as he worried by Da-wol's bedside.

I like Lee Jae-won. I told myself I wouldn't check the internet until I remembered his past work. Once I remembered he was in Mr. Queen, I went to asianwiki for confirmation. And he is warming up his character to me even though he is quite conservative. I'm quite conservative too on some matters, but he a fogey. I'm curious to see how his arc with Bi-chwi will refine his conservativeness and make him a modern...

I don't like the ML. You don't do that to someone you love or even like. He had perfectly valid reasons for wanting a divorce, so communicate that. I understand it is hard to get a divorce, but fight for that. He took the cowards way out because he didn't want to have a hard conversation. All he lost was money. She lost dignity, a love she thought she had, and piece of mind. What he did wasn't just cruel, it was worse than that. I can empathize with his reasoning for not wanting to be married, I cannot empathize with how went about doing that. the ends don't justify the means in this case. I honestly don't know how they are going to bring them back together and I really don't want them to, lol. I wish he had cheated.

I’ve been trying to figure out how the drama wants me to feel about our characters right now. Do they want me to be almost fully Team ML? As a contrast to last week when folks were mostly Team FL? I’m honestly not sure, but that’s where I am. It’s really interesting to read @missvictrix's perspective, because it’s almost completely different from mine! What Eun-beom did was not great and I’m not defending it, but the divorce laws in Korea don’t seem to allow for no-fault divorces, so it honestly makes sense that people would occasionally fake an affair to get one. And after seeing all the ugly sides of Ha-ra this week, I find myself on his side in all this. I fully believe he tried to stand up for his side at the beginning of their marriage, but that her temper flaring would have eventually made him realize that fighting with her was pointless.

I was totally incensed with almost everything she did regarding the case this week. Not sure I’m willing to give her that hall pass. Most of it was not legal, let alone ethical. Her snide remarks to his client (who he told her point-blank was not his date), weaseling her way onto the case as opposing counsel, drugging him, accepting evidence that her friend stole from his office and showing it to her client, getting so mad when she sees him with his client that she doesn’t try to talk things out outside the courtroom, and not speaking up when she knew her client was going to flee the country. Did I miss anything? I did like her more when she apologized to the SML (whose name I can’t remember because I find him fairly bland) and when she was reflecting on her own part in the marriage failing.

I’m glad the truth about their divorce came out fairly quickly, and I did enjoy her trying to guess the reason he felt he needed to take such drastic measures and hitting every single one of the noble idiocy reasons Beanies mentioned last week. That’s not what we want and the show knows it! And it’s good that she finally had a chance to think about what their relationship was like from his perspective, but it’s such a bummer that it took all of this to make that happen.

https://www.nytimes.com/2023/01/27/opinion/south-korea-fertility-rate-feminism.html

This feels relevant in a behind the scenes way.

My real life experiences cause me to have a different view than most. I don’t like Ha-ra. I think she’s immature and a terrible and unprofessional lawyer. It’s disappointing, because I wish she had earned her “Goddess of Litigation” title honestly. I like her less after Episode 4. I’m not moved by her new romance, either. She doesn’t need people in her circle affirming her narcissism; she needs them to tell her the truth so she can get her act together.
I totally get why Eun-bum wanted out. I’ve been there. Marriage to a control freak is MISERABLE. It kills your soul and you begin to lose yourself. It is much better to be alone. At this point in the drama, I don’t want Ha-ra and Eun-bum back together. From what I’ve seen so far, I think he’s kinder than she and deserves to be with someone who will appreciate him.

Can I say it? I don't like Ha-Ra. (And I think that's the point.)

Ha-Ra is overbearing and unprofessional, has anger management issues, and has put herself on a hero pedestal. I couldn't believe she had the audacity to berate Eun-Bum about attorney-client privilege after she and her friend literally snooped in his office to steal case documents to use against him in court. I was seething during that scene and the subsequent fallout. She had the public reveal of her divorce coming, and I didn't feel bad when it happened in court after all she did.

Like I said before, I think the drama is purposely making Ha-Ra this way, and we do it a disservice by giving her unwavering support just because she's the FL. Eun-Bum is no saint either, but we shouldn't automated hate him just because he divorced the FL.

I have sympathy for Eun-Bum because marriage can be hard. It's so easy to just do the dishes at night because your partner wants to rest, but then suddenly it's 3 years later and you're still doing the dishes every night. But then you look petty bringing it up. "Why didn't you say something sooner?" "I wanted you to rest..." "But if it bothered you, you should've said so!" "Well, I didn't mind..." "So why are you bringing it up?" And on and on. It's never really about the dishes.

Aren't communication and finances the most common reasons for divorce? It's so easy as outsiders to say that they should've went to therapy and talked more, but was that realistic for their situation? Ha-Ra admits to herself (which I loved) that she would've never let it go. So should they just have stayed in an unhappy, unhealthy marriage, and then bring a child into that situation?!

I see it as this started off as a "it's no one's fault that the relationship failed" type of divorce. But with Korea's laws, it wasn't easy to do that. I don't believe that Eun-Bum went about their divorce the right way. (And I loved how he said he's responsible for the consequences of his choice.) But I do believe that they needed to divorce.

I do hope both leads learn from the situation and become better people. They each needed a wake-up call in how to navigate life, and I hope that positive change is coming. Hopefully with fewer actions that lead to getting disbarred.

Thanks @missvictrix for this weecap. This drama is a fascinating watch as a family therapist. I am loving the various perspectives discussed in the comments section and can totally understand why for some it’s a NO.

I was watching episode 4 in the airport arrivals lounge while waiting for my taxi to arrive and must have intrigued a lot of people by my reactions as I could not contain myself at certain points🤣

I think they are really doing a great job of using the cases to explore the issues within the main couple’s relationship but the actual things they do as lawyers are getting increasingly ridiculous and pull me out of the drama at points. It reminds me of Ally McBeal in some ways with her imagination and the way the various characters in the firm interact with each other.

‘The whole plot line with CEO Seo wanting them to drop honorifics — and then Bi-chwi going at it full steam ahead calling him super informally — was hilarious’ 👈I was crying with laughter throughout.

First, I agree that Fake Adultery was both lame and a cruel way to end this marriage. Actually, one reason why some people cheat is to end their marriage- it is the one time when the victim of the adultery does not have control of what comes next for the relationship. Which explains why he chose this ridiculous and hurtful method.

If you caught what Seo-Hee said then you know that we actually have not heard the real story yet. There is a trauma that Eun-beum went through- one that happened to a child of her daughter's age.

As one sided as their relationship was- with Ha-ra seldom accommodating her man while he always gave way to her- that is not why he did what he did. Her planning for a baby triggered that trauma and that caused Eun-beum to panic which explains this hare-brained piece of idiocy- it has all the hallmarks of a panic reaction. While it is a great thing that she now sees that their relationship was out of balance the real problem was a trauma that Eun-beom had never really dealt with.

But now, just as Ha-ra has decided to date her new guy it appears that Seo-hee has reached out to Eun-beum to make a real relationship beyond the simple friendship which was really all that they had before. Forget the 'first love' thing- that was just part of the story he told Ha-ra- It is Ha-ra who was his first love.

Hmmm, it was a heavy week for K-drama land. I don't want to know what team everyone is on now but I want to say my mind too.
I'm someone admittedly of low self-esteem and what happened to Ha-ra would have torned me to pieces. Watching this made me afraid, first I can't read minds and I'm imperfect. When you can't handle my imperfections please tell me, Ha-ra was bossy and overbearing but she did not deserve all this.
I hate to say this, but it's better if they go their separate ways for good. He did not love her, he hated her imperfections, it made him regret everything. The hate he had swelled to the point that he would do anything for a way out. When he was asked to choose between getting her back or setting her up with someone else to end the alimony, he chose the easiest way because after all, he never cared of her feelings. The drama should stop making him look as if he still loves her. He does not, if not that holding the lie of cheating would ruin Ki seo-hee's chances of winning the case, he never would have said the truth. If he is so desperate to prove the truth, why not spit it out then and if better separate. When you love someone, you do not have to love their imperfections, if you are being forced to take what your stomach hates, your body will pull it out. It's left for you to fix it and work toward it. It's better if they remain strangers and I sincerely hope he finds happiness again.
Whether Ha-ra choose to date again or remain single now, let her do it. That I'm watching her does not give me the right to judge her choices.

Soo I have to be honest, I have this thing in romance dramas where I love when the ML rejects or hurts the FL and then FL pulls away from him, while ML eventually comes to change his tune (Another Miss Oh is one I love like this). It gets me in the feels every time. I got that vibe from ep 4, and it was enough to keep me hooked. The fact that the FL knows ML would rather be poor and paying a ton of alimony than stay married to her? The ANGST. I hope she treats him as a stranger now.

I understand why people don't want the ML and FL back together, but this is a romance drama and I am not okay with romance dramas not having the main leads end up together. I expect them to end up together and, if that does not happen, I will feel misled. I do not watch romance dramas for realistic or bittersweet endings. Plus, they're getting with the second leads too quickly for it to last.

Also, a relative of mine had a marriage where he did all of the housework and never got his way, and rather than actually TALKING about it just built up resentment until finally he ended up having an affair. The marriage ended when he got caught, and a lot of us wonder if he got caught on purpose. So, I actually find this twist super realistic and relatable.

Man, so many comments so fast haha
I'm about to be swallowed up but I guess everyone, like me, had a lot of thoughts after seeing this week's episodes. I don't even know where to start.

First off, through this show I realized just how important and impactful the concept of no fault divorce is. I am hoping all the cases in this show don't involve adultry or custody cases (that throw in a mention of domestic violence). Like are those the only reasons people break up a marriage, cheating or violence?

I kinda went on a journey over these episodes because less than 10 minutes into episode 3, I was tempted to call it quits with this show and just read recaps (or forget about this show entirely) but I wanted to know if there was more to Eun Bum's story so I stuck it out haha. It was hard because I was really disliking both leads during episode 3. I *really* didn't like Ha Ra getting involved in a custody case just to stick it to him. Those situations are already messy for the kids and now here she comes bringing in her own vendetta. I didn't like how bumbling Eun Bom seemed to be. I don't know if we're really supposed to believe he was drugged so he would oversleep (I wouldn't necessarily not believe it but it would just make me feel for him more) but I guess he's had this aspect to his personality from the beginning.

We already knew she wasn't over him but it's been a couple of years now so she definitely wasn't owned any explanations about why they were at a resturant or why she was leaving his apartment. In that moment, I was kinda right along with Seo Hee when she called her out on that. Plus Ha Ra kept mentioning him being used which just made me think of sloppy seconds and I just felt like that was offensive to anyone with exes (herself included).

Episode 4 was better for me because I felt that captured a feeling that many people nowadays are feeling and are dismissed or shamed for feeling. Some people just aren't meant for the married life. I just really thought Eun Bum trying to explain his point but not being quite being understood because others couldn't relate was so on point.

I get his coworker is old fashioned but seriously, the things he says sometimes such as having a baby would've made things better. He's so naive (and it's not endearing to me. Well, after his hook up, I totally saw him thinking they should officially meet each other's parents coming haha that was so innocent haha) but I get that he's also supposed to represent a certain type of conservative mindset and "return to the good ole days".

I honestly just saw there was some study or article about couples who marry without living together first are more "durable" and episode 4 showed an example of exactly why that might not work. They dated for a decade but apparently they still had enough space from each other they didn't see how incompatible they were living together and how they were on different wavelengths. Such as she...

I knew there wasn't a good enough reason to justify lying about having an affair; genuinely confused on how he dated her for 10 years without taking a stance against Hara every once in a while. Once again proves that communication is key. SIDE EYE FR...I think this drama would be more poignant if our leads moved on and didn't end up with each other but I'm still a bit suspicious about Eunbum's side of things...somehow it feels like he's holding back some things (and tbh for a man that lied about having an affair, I cannot trust anything he says as "truth" lol) which may turn things around for their situation yet again...but I'm tired of incompetent men, let SML be a strong and winning contender!

I was really taken aback that she would represent a domestic violence offender in a custody case. The idea that somehow cheating is as bad as domestic violence is just insane to me! It's hard for me to root for Ah Ra.

This series oddly reminds me of another recent series. 'Hit The Spot' ('Fanta G Spot'), that vulgar attempt to do a Korean version of 'Sex and the City'. Did we really need a full episode about erectile dysfunction? That other show was also less a drama than a collection of sex ed PSAs strung together.

I'm still reeling from the way the big secret was revealed. Of all the law flaws this show is exhibiting, Eun Beom could've tried to get away from the court to talk to Hara AND his client that he used in his manipulative schemes. His character has showed zero redeeming qualities whatsoever. I get that he felt that was his only way out of a marriage he was unhappy with, but it's been years NOW, how can he be still callous and uncaring about what he did to Hara. Echoing the comments that he's a coward that rather runs away from problems than face them. Hara is headstrong and stubborn but she at least owns up to her mistakes.

I don't mind the big episode 3 reveal of faking the affair because this is straight-up soap opera stuff so is to be taken as seriously as soap opera stuff. The characters all come across as soap opera characters so they are one step removed from the real world outrage of such a secret divulged.