I was warming up to our main couple again now that we’re past the misunderstandings and passive aggression, but the last scene of Ep16 threw me off again.
Shanshan has her flaws as a character, but the fact that she’s such an independent girl, yet came all the way to look for Momo to confide in her, indicates how troubled she is by her problems with Fupei.
And Momo didn’t even bother listening to her right from the start, much less try to help. If you let Shanshan stay, you should listen to her. If you weren’t prepared to, you can tell her it’s not a good time. She did ask. It’s like… come on. You can be in a cute, loving new relationship without being a terrible friend, you know :/ #PutYourHeadOnMyShoulder
At first, I blamed Shanshan for imposing on Weimo couple but aside from the annoyance that she interrupted my enjoyment, I think what happened was realistic. Shanshan is thinking purely of her own misery, she didn’t notice or didn’t bother that she was imposing on Wei Yi and Momo.
For Momo, she knows and she does place importance on her friendship with Shanshan, that’s why she let her stay all night till the morning. She tried to lend a listening ear but was so ever distracted because what she really wants is to spend time with Wei Yi.
She’s an imperfect friend but not a terrible one. Same goes with Shanshan.
Yeah, also Shan Shan already talked MoMo’s ears off on the phone the night prior which abruptly ends DoraMo’s evening together. I think it would be difficult for anyone to once again give full attention when a friend is obviously in the mood just to rant, repeatedly no less.
But Shan Shan did ask Mo Mo for advice, and she wasn’t just there to rant. We don’t know how long the phone call went on for, because it wasn’t shown, and Mo Mo was quite dismissive of Shan Shan’s concerns even on the phone call (she told Shan Shan that FP will come back begging in a day or two, but that’s not a solution to the issue). I think that’s why Shan Shan sought advice again, because Mo Mo wasn’t listening carefully enough to give proper advice or at least to tell her she isn’t in the position to do so.
That’s true, but then she doesn’t have to be avoidant about it. She can just tell Shan Shan that she isn’t in a position to advise her about Fu Pei, and Shan Shan is mature enough to understand that. It’ll be nice if Shan Shan picked up on that, but she is clearly quite distressed, and Mo Mo isn’t making it very clear, so I wouldn’t blame Shan Shan for not inferring this.
MoMo did clearly say that’s fuPei is a scum and expressed her disapproval even before they started dating.
And MoMo can only do so much because she has to draw a line when it comes to FuPei. It’s not easy for her to give advice because her prejudice for FuPei is high.
Even if ShanShan is wrong MoMo will always blame FuPei. I think it’s best she doesn’t get involved. This one ShanShan has to fix herself.
Also it’s MoMo’s personality. I don’t think she shares her feelings and discusses much. Even her mom mentions that. Not all friends act the same. Some friends are for advice, some friends are just there for you and some friends help you with distraction.
I don’t think she did bad.
You’re right that different people help their friends in different ways, but that’s exactly my point. It would be nice if she were willing to listen, and actually did. But she didn’t have to, and she could’ve wiggled her way out of it. My issue with her is that she neither turned Shan Shan away nor listened after inviting her in. And the way the show scripted it admittedly made it worse, because it’s not that Mo Mo was shown listening at first, then getting tired after a while (that’s natural, and I’d understand). She just wasn’t listening from the start, and that was unpleasant.
If she’s not comfortable saying it directly, that she doesn’t want to help out where Fu Pei is involved, she could have told Shan Shan she had plans for the night. Shan Shan should have been prepared to be turned away, because you need to consider that as a possibility when you turn up unannounced at someone’s house. Or if Mo Mo wanted a more permanent solution, she could ask Shan Shan to consult one of her other friends with more relationship experience.
I’m probably the only one to agree with you on this – maybe because I’ve found myself exactly in Shan Shan’s interrupting shoes in the past. 😅 (Not that I stayed all night, or even half an hour) BUT there are definitely better ways for Momo to have handled that scenario. However, for the sake of comedy in a rom com, I let it slide.
I wish I were able to let it slide, but it fed into my discomfort with Mo Mo’s behaviour in the past few episodes. She does seem quite self-centred no matter who she’s with.
When she was jealous over the lab senior and Wei Yi’s interactions, she behaved however she wanted to towards Wei Yi without considering how he might feel on the receiving end (it’s lucky that he didn’t mind). When Prof Jiang said he would keep the kitten, she wanted to keep it even though she was staying at a place that’s not her own, and the owner of the place is allergic. And even during their cute date, she kept adding items onto their order until Wei Yi noticed it was enough and didn’t add his own picks.
So I guess it’s not surprising that in this case, she would choose to focus on the fact that she wants to spend more time with Wei Yi rather than that Shan Shan is really in need of help. I just want to enjoy this as the light-hearted slice-of-life rom-com it is, without these glaring flaws that are being passed off as… not flaws, because the female lead is cute and gets away with it. I liked her when she spoke up for herself earlier on in the show (e.g. when she rejected Fu Pei), but subsequently, I feel like the show stopped trying to show her strengths.
On this point, I again, agree with you. I mentioned it in my very first post: http://www.dramabeans.com/members/greenfields/activity/766701/
but rather briefly. Momo’s expectations drive me nuts. She expects her boyfriend/kind of boyfriend (at that time Fu Pei) to accompany her for interviews, pick her up from school, answer all phone calls immediately, now she half expects Wei Yi to be there after work hours, he does all the cooking, he picks up her shoes, he pays for everything (the money thing might be cultural?) and on and on.
What I understand is that the show is trying to project the image of The Perfect Guy and we’re meant to fawn over Wei Yi. I can also appreciate that Momo isn’t perfect, she’s actually quite self centered. But it IS a bit much, more so because the show doesn’t portray her in a self-centered light. We seem to be seeing her as Wei Yi sees her; and need to take a step back to see what you’ve rightly pointed out. Imho.
That’s true, I hadn’t noticed it extended to her expectations from so early on, and that the image/fantasy of a guy like Wei Yi is part of the genre. I’m happy to have shows with flawed characters, but it’s more meaningful when the show takes us through their growth as they learn to address their own flaws.
I guess that’s why I’ve started looking forward more to Shan Shan and Fu Pei’s relationship, because even though I dislike FP as a character, their relationship is guided by the navigation of SS’s expectations and FP’s personality weakness.
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PurpleTeapot
May 5, 2019 at 6:18 AM
I was warming up to our main couple again now that we’re past the misunderstandings and passive aggression, but the last scene of Ep16 threw me off again.
Shanshan has her flaws as a character, but the fact that she’s such an independent girl, yet came all the way to look for Momo to confide in her, indicates how troubled she is by her problems with Fupei.
And Momo didn’t even bother listening to her right from the start, much less try to help. If you let Shanshan stay, you should listen to her. If you weren’t prepared to, you can tell her it’s not a good time. She did ask. It’s like… come on. You can be in a cute, loving new relationship without being a terrible friend, you know :/ #PutYourHeadOnMyShoulder
outofthisworld 不愧是我 🏍
May 5, 2019 at 6:44 AM
I have a different view.
At first, I blamed Shanshan for imposing on Weimo couple but aside from the annoyance that she interrupted my enjoyment, I think what happened was realistic. Shanshan is thinking purely of her own misery, she didn’t notice or didn’t bother that she was imposing on Wei Yi and Momo.
For Momo, she knows and she does place importance on her friendship with Shanshan, that’s why she let her stay all night till the morning. She tried to lend a listening ear but was so ever distracted because what she really wants is to spend time with Wei Yi.
She’s an imperfect friend but not a terrible one. Same goes with Shanshan.
Blue (@mayhemf)
May 5, 2019 at 7:29 AM
What ShanShan is failing to notice is that MoMo doesn’t want anything to do with FuPei.
🍙 kimbap noona
May 5, 2019 at 7:48 AM
Yeah, also Shan Shan already talked MoMo’s ears off on the phone the night prior which abruptly ends DoraMo’s evening together. I think it would be difficult for anyone to once again give full attention when a friend is obviously in the mood just to rant, repeatedly no less.
PurpleTeapot
May 6, 2019 at 5:25 AM
But Shan Shan did ask Mo Mo for advice, and she wasn’t just there to rant. We don’t know how long the phone call went on for, because it wasn’t shown, and Mo Mo was quite dismissive of Shan Shan’s concerns even on the phone call (she told Shan Shan that FP will come back begging in a day or two, but that’s not a solution to the issue). I think that’s why Shan Shan sought advice again, because Mo Mo wasn’t listening carefully enough to give proper advice or at least to tell her she isn’t in the position to do so.
PurpleTeapot
May 6, 2019 at 5:27 AM
That’s true, but then she doesn’t have to be avoidant about it. She can just tell Shan Shan that she isn’t in a position to advise her about Fu Pei, and Shan Shan is mature enough to understand that. It’ll be nice if Shan Shan picked up on that, but she is clearly quite distressed, and Mo Mo isn’t making it very clear, so I wouldn’t blame Shan Shan for not inferring this.
Blue (@mayhemf)
May 5, 2019 at 7:28 AM
MoMo did clearly say that’s fuPei is a scum and expressed her disapproval even before they started dating.
And MoMo can only do so much because she has to draw a line when it comes to FuPei. It’s not easy for her to give advice because her prejudice for FuPei is high.
Even if ShanShan is wrong MoMo will always blame FuPei. I think it’s best she doesn’t get involved. This one ShanShan has to fix herself.
Also it’s MoMo’s personality. I don’t think she shares her feelings and discusses much. Even her mom mentions that. Not all friends act the same. Some friends are for advice, some friends are just there for you and some friends help you with distraction.
I don’t think she did bad.
PurpleTeapot
May 6, 2019 at 5:43 AM
You’re right that different people help their friends in different ways, but that’s exactly my point. It would be nice if she were willing to listen, and actually did. But she didn’t have to, and she could’ve wiggled her way out of it. My issue with her is that she neither turned Shan Shan away nor listened after inviting her in. And the way the show scripted it admittedly made it worse, because it’s not that Mo Mo was shown listening at first, then getting tired after a while (that’s natural, and I’d understand). She just wasn’t listening from the start, and that was unpleasant.
If she’s not comfortable saying it directly, that she doesn’t want to help out where Fu Pei is involved, she could have told Shan Shan she had plans for the night. Shan Shan should have been prepared to be turned away, because you need to consider that as a possibility when you turn up unannounced at someone’s house. Or if Mo Mo wanted a more permanent solution, she could ask Shan Shan to consult one of her other friends with more relationship experience.
greenfields
May 5, 2019 at 11:19 AM
I’m probably the only one to agree with you on this – maybe because I’ve found myself exactly in Shan Shan’s interrupting shoes in the past. 😅 (Not that I stayed all night, or even half an hour) BUT there are definitely better ways for Momo to have handled that scenario. However, for the sake of comedy in a rom com, I let it slide.
PurpleTeapot
May 6, 2019 at 5:35 AM
I wish I were able to let it slide, but it fed into my discomfort with Mo Mo’s behaviour in the past few episodes. She does seem quite self-centred no matter who she’s with.
When she was jealous over the lab senior and Wei Yi’s interactions, she behaved however she wanted to towards Wei Yi without considering how he might feel on the receiving end (it’s lucky that he didn’t mind). When Prof Jiang said he would keep the kitten, she wanted to keep it even though she was staying at a place that’s not her own, and the owner of the place is allergic. And even during their cute date, she kept adding items onto their order until Wei Yi noticed it was enough and didn’t add his own picks.
So I guess it’s not surprising that in this case, she would choose to focus on the fact that she wants to spend more time with Wei Yi rather than that Shan Shan is really in need of help. I just want to enjoy this as the light-hearted slice-of-life rom-com it is, without these glaring flaws that are being passed off as… not flaws, because the female lead is cute and gets away with it. I liked her when she spoke up for herself earlier on in the show (e.g. when she rejected Fu Pei), but subsequently, I feel like the show stopped trying to show her strengths.
greenfields
May 6, 2019 at 10:52 AM
On this point, I again, agree with you. I mentioned it in my very first post:
http://www.dramabeans.com/members/greenfields/activity/766701/
but rather briefly. Momo’s expectations drive me nuts. She expects her boyfriend/kind of boyfriend (at that time Fu Pei) to accompany her for interviews, pick her up from school, answer all phone calls immediately, now she half expects Wei Yi to be there after work hours, he does all the cooking, he picks up her shoes, he pays for everything (the money thing might be cultural?) and on and on.
What I understand is that the show is trying to project the image of The Perfect Guy and we’re meant to fawn over Wei Yi. I can also appreciate that Momo isn’t perfect, she’s actually quite self centered. But it IS a bit much, more so because the show doesn’t portray her in a self-centered light. We seem to be seeing her as Wei Yi sees her; and need to take a step back to see what you’ve rightly pointed out. Imho.
PurpleTeapot
May 9, 2019 at 12:44 AM
That’s true, I hadn’t noticed it extended to her expectations from so early on, and that the image/fantasy of a guy like Wei Yi is part of the genre. I’m happy to have shows with flawed characters, but it’s more meaningful when the show takes us through their growth as they learn to address their own flaws.
I guess that’s why I’ve started looking forward more to Shan Shan and Fu Pei’s relationship, because even though I dislike FP as a character, their relationship is guided by the navigation of SS’s expectations and FP’s personality weakness.