Seasons of Blossom: Episodes 11-12

by mistyisles

This week is all about regret — less in terms of things done in the past, and more in terms of things left undone and unsaid. But unfortunately, dwelling on “if onlys” doesn’t always help us make better choices in the future.

 
EPISODES 11-12 WEECAP

As we might expect, Ha-min’s mother responded to finding his artwork by ripping it up in front of him and ordering him to attend the lessons she wanted, having already withdrawn him from the art studio. When Ha-min pointed out that she was treating him like a doll instead of a son, she slapped him. Jae-min saw it all, and now as he confronts her, he doesn’t hold back any of the resentment that has built up since Ha-min’s death.

His mother is remorseful, but redirects with the news that she’s pregnant. She wants to do better this time around, and she asks that he give her one more chance and help her make atonement to Ha-min. All Jae-min can muster is a small “congratulations.” And honestly, I can’t blame him.

That said, Jae-min’s mom does provide So-mang with deeper insight into Jae-min’s internal struggles, which he continues to keep a tight lid on. Before moving back to Seoul, she’d found him seconds away from jumping off the balcony. When she’d tearfully begged him to say she’d mistaken his intention, he’d mumbled with frightening lack of emotion that he just missed Ha-min too much. That’s why she sent him back to Ha-min’s old school.

As for Ha-min himself, he put on a brave face for So-mang following his forced departure from the art studio. But though So-mang tried to be there for him, things just kept happening to keep him beaten down. His grades plummeted, embarrassing him in front of the other students. One of So-mang’s friends found out about her key to the art room, unknowingly invading Ha-min’s sacred space.

Finally, he had enough. He called So-mang to the art room and grabbed her in a desperate hug to recharge his drained soul. But one of the other students saw them embracing, goaded Ha-min into a fight, and reported them for “inappropriate” contact. To protect So-mang from the inevitable rumors, Ha-min claimed he’d been with some other girl, producing as proof the art room keys he’d gotten copied.

Just like that, Ha-min plunged from school role model to the object of everyone’s disgust, gossip doing its usual job of turning an innocent hug into something far more scandalous. Ha-min suggested he and So-mang keep their distance from one another until everything blew over, and So-mang agreed, unaware that they wouldn’t speak face-to-face again for an entire year.

When they finally did speak to each other again, it was because a teacher asked them to carry boxes to the art room. After confirming that Ha-min had been intentionally ignoring her calls, So-mang’s patience waned. All she wanted was to support him, but she was starting to feel as though their time together had never been anything more than a dream. Ha-min, through tears, threw back that she was better off forgetting it happened, anyway.

What happened next is even more heartbreaking, and it’s one of the biggest sources of So-mang’s enduring regret. They relocated to the roof for privacy, where their argument escalated to the point that So-mang called Ha-min a coward for giving up on his own dreams and stormed off, leaving him alone. Halfway down the stairs, she almost turned back, but didn’t. To this day, So-mang wonders if she could have saved him had she returned to him then.

But it appears that Ha-min jumped from the school roof that very night, as evidenced by the story a teacher tells the present-day students to regain their attention on a rainy day. It’s a tough moment to watch: it starts out as just a fun ghost story for the distracted students, but quickly turns dark as we, So-mang, and Jae-min all start to realize the story is about Ha-min. So-mang stops him before he can get into too much detail, and later Jae-min returns the favor by interrupting when the teacher berates her for it. Then he gives her Ha-min’s diary to read.

As summer break approaches, so does the end of Bo-mi and Jin-young’s fake relationship. Although it’s clear to just about everyone that Jin-young is head over heels for Bo-mi, she’s still unsure of her feelings in general. Jin-young tells her to take her time deciding what she wants to do once their contract expires, and that he’s fine with whatever she chooses.

Jin-young was never overbearing or pushy, and now he pulls back even further than normal to give Bo-mi space. But finally, one rainy evening after Bo-mi has decided to stay late at school, Jin-young does what So-mang didn’t — he turns back. Whether he’s too late to officially express his feelings remains to be seen, but he may still be too late to do it tonight. Because Bo-mi owes Jae-min a wish, and now he’s come to collect: will she believe him if he says the student who died at the school was his brother?

The closer we get to the end, the heavier this story gets, and the more I dread what’s to come. We’ve seen all but Ha-min’s actual final moments and the immediate aftermath, and while I — and So-mang and Jae-min — need that closure, part of me wants to just skip over that part entirely when it does come. I keep finding myself hoping that there might be a way out, so to speak — that it will turn out Ha-min survived somehow, or that his death would be revealed to have been caused by some external force instead — but none of those ways out would be true to the story that’s being told. Or to the reality of hopelessness that Ha-min, and people like him in real life, experienced.

So instead, I’ll hope for, well, hope. For that much-needed closure and healing, especially for So-mang and Jae-min. For our characters to learn how to be honest with themselves and each other long before it’s too late. And for those who made terrible choices in the past to grow from those mistakes and do better moving forward so that future Ha-mins will have all the support they need.

 
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