Oh this hits on all the right points! ❤️❤️

This was a very good read! Thanks @missvictrix and @wishfultoki !

On the question of whether a story that “hits home” makes me more or less likely to watch it...

I've read psychology and scientific articles that say that people remember negative emotions, experiences and events more strongly and in more detail, even for those people who maintain positive outlooks in life.

So for me, it's often the dramas whereby a character is going through the same unpleasant experiences as me, that I relate significantly more to, rather than happy events in those dramas. In this context, I'm more likely to continue watching the drama, precisely because sometimes when you're stuck in a rut in real life, or getting too caught up in your own negative emotions in real life, that seeing how other people (i.e. those characters in the dramas) go about handling them gives me fresh perspectives and even pulls me out of my self-wallowing funk many times. And dramas also give me faith and hope that even if times are difficult in this current moment, and it's hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel, there will always be that light.

And even when I feel like a particular character (especially a female one, since I'm female too) is different from me, that doesn't necessarily mean I relate lesser to her too. In fact, I've realized over the years of drama-watching that when there are traits in those characters which are different from mine, but which I think I "should" in fact be having in my constant introspection of myself and wanting to correct certain behaviours or traits of myself, I actually draw a lot of lessons from them. Case in point -- "Because This Life is Our First" helped me a lot through a difficult point in my life, seeing how the female lead faltered, yet she was able to feel hurt, but ultimately recover and set healthy boundaries for herself etc.

I always love your essays, thanks a lot @missvictrix!
The emotions are one of the biggest reasons, why I fell into the drama hole. I've watched my first drama around 4 years ago when my boyfriend went to Korea to work there and I just wanted to know a little bit more about a country I knew almost nothing about.
At first I missed my boyfriend so much that I didn't know how to handle it, and so the dramas became my gateway to my emotions. Whenever something bad happened to the leads I would cry so much for them but also for me. My most emotional connection at this point was with ”Oh Hae Young Again“. Oh Hae Young was an emotional mess throughout the first half ot the drama – just like me at this point. For a long time I was afraid of people since I was bullied a lot before I moved to another city to study. So I could feel Oh Hae Young’s low self-esteem and her desire to be loved by someone. Eventually, her journey in the drama had me manage my own very low self-esteem.
There are more dramas that stirred emotions I wouldn't want to deal with otherwise. So I can actually say, my drama experience in the last 4 years made me grow as a person. My boyfriend still works in Korea, however, I'm not an emotional mess anymore ;-) But I still enjoy how dramas evoke feelings with their storytelling.

‘ Feeling emotions based in the world of the drama are one thing, but feeling emotions in real life because of the drama is even stronger.’
THIS.
Sometimes, a character in a drama will guide us a way to tackle emotions in real life, through a drama completely irrelevant of our lives.
No matter how different the settings are, a person is still a person with multiple facets with different layers.
if we are lucky enough, we will find a side of our facet in a character and that’s it, we’ll share the emotions with the character.
I think that’s why storytelling is so powerful. Thank you for this insightful article.

"That is, what does the drama wake up in us that no one else knows about?"
Oh indeed, what do they wake up that no one else will ever know about...

"here’s a question to ponder: does a story that “hits home” make you more or less likely to watch it?"
- This really depends on what is hitting home for me.
Often I'm in the middle of something by the time anything hits home, and I think it'd be more likely to make me keep going the majority of the time. For example, sometimes something connects from the very beginning and I keep going because of that one specific thing, but not always to the conclusion I desire.
But another layer to something "hitting home" might be more of a trigger moment. Yeah it hits home, but uh... external factors mean that's not always a good thing. Is this what I need right now? And then it's back to something being a mood-breaker, as it were; there are those that can hit a deep nerve, in a good way and in a bad way, or that can just hit home in an abstract, comforting way.

I want to add another level to the #2 stories:
Those that produce visceral reactions, either negative or positive, something beyond just mere emotion, spiritual if you will. There aren't many of these for me, and I'm not going to give examples right now (some of you can probably guess), but oh boy do they exist.

"Stories affect us on so many planes — sometimes we don’t give them enough credit for their power."
Ahhh noo stories have so much power; that's why I love them so much.

Love your essays, as always. Thanks for sharing!

This weekend I binged Go back couple and yes, it was as fantastic as everyone was telling me. But it was specially painful (but in a good way, is such a thing exists) watching JinJoo reaction to being reunited with her mum. Jang Nara and Kim Mi Kyung share that bond and express so well the feeling. The way JinJoo holds her mum is just the way I would hold mine if given the chance to go back in time to be with her one day.

It was so real. Writer-nim knew how to do it. Actors new how to express the feeling and the directing was perfect.

And tears appear as I write this.

This is what dramas do.

Such a beautiful essay, @missvictrix!
"A drama can stir our feelings, but instead of drawing attention to tension and conflict, it can deliver positive and affirming emotions instead." This!

Nice read ❤ This is exactly the reason why a lot of us have a hard time letting go of koreandramas or the act of drama watching itself. Every drama is a new experience. I wouldn't trade anything else for it.

@missvictrix What a thoughtful and insightful essay. Thank you for sharing, @wishfultoki.

I can't watch a drama without thinking of the pandemic nowadays. When Lee Gon donned a black mask, my heart sank, because it was a jarring and unwelcome reminder of the new reality, so scary and unfamiliar. I watch characters talking, interacting, hugging, kissing, breathing in each other's air, and I cringe and mutter, "Social distancing."

"The World of the Married" is the first drama to ever make me feel so raw. Rage. Pain. Fear. Disbelief. It was a rollercoaster of emotions. It dug deep into me and resonated with me. And then there was "Forest" which stirred my emotional pot so bad it messed with my head permanently. It was so awful that it made me want to reach into my screen, and throttle the FL. Now, THAT was a first for me.

This was beautiful. Whenever I talk about tv shows I am watching I was say "I'm about to go watch my stories." I love storytelling in all of its forms whether reading, listening, or watching. Storytelling is one of the few ways humans get to read other people's mind, it is one of the few ways we get to disappear so to speak into something else, and a way to invoke strong emotion without it necesaarily being personal. 😍

❤️❤️

Drama writers have tools (tropes) to craft a story, but it takes a good director to stage the appropriate mood, setting and action to get the emotional responses from the actors. It is the convergence of these elements that give unexpected scenes which spark an emotional response.
We have seen many shows having the same premise and theme, but with vast differences in execution and performance. Some have such weak scripts, the cast cannot salvage it. Some have such strong chemistry from the leads, the script becomes secondary. It is still rare for a drama to hit on all cylinders.

Hotel Del Luna did that for me. The fact that even when wishes and dreams were different, Gu Chan-sung had to choose multiple times to let go of Jang Man-wol and her acceptance of it broke me. The scene where she pours off the new wine from the balcony moved me to tears. Made me realize that 'Happily ever afters' need not be actually 'ever afters' long as drilled in our minds. I continued with this drama till the end though.
The drama I couldn't watch at the end was When the weather was nice. I just couldn't handle the grief of Hae-won's aunt and the atonement she created for herself. Her character was the one I had grown to love in the drama and I hated to see her break down. I just read the reviews here for the last episode after a while.

Nice article, @missvictrix. CSB is a really talented actress. Probably one of a few actresses that can do comedy, drama and villainous roles very well. I remember first seeing her as mean girl Soo Ah in Sassy Go Go and she managed to bring depth to the character and make her relatable. In a way, the character also reminded me of myself as I grew up with a strict mom who demands the best.

I watched Misaeng around the time that I was contemplating of resigning from work. Seeing Manager Oh inspired me and made me want to persevere. Here's comes someone who refuses to take bull from his higher ups and tried his best to work with dignity and integrity at all times.

For me a good drama will always be a drama which connected with me from beginning till the end.

This is a beautifully written piece and exactly why I keep coming back to kdrama -and televisoon by extension.

The way certain shows have made me feel cannot be described. I don't know to which degree it is intentional, as sometimes even I didn't know what I really needed until a show catches me by surprise. It seems wild to me that people would know exactly which spot to hit. I guess there are just so many universal feelings and experiences that if you keep looking, you will find a drama that captures exactly what you needed at that moment in time.

Shoutout to i am not a robot, a piece of your mind and sassy gogo (chae soobin is the goddess of my heart really) but also my ajussi, blackdog and 30/17. I dont know if the drama teams knew exactly what they were doing, but thank you for making my heart sing.

This is one great article.

Really enjoyed it. It has a great perspective I never thought about before. And it's totally true too❤️❤️@missvictrix@wishfultoki

i am amazed at how well you guys write my feelings down and make sense of them! you are awesome writers!

Really great and thought-provoking essay! I'm reminded of when I was finishing up high school, School 2013 was one of the first dramas I live-watched. My school life was nothing remotely like the drama (thank god) but I related in a lot of the struggles and pressures- there was a lot of ugly crying but it was very cathartic

I was just talking about this on a different blog, too. Oh My Baby brought me to tears at least once in each of the first 4 episodes, because it was hitting all the feelings I'd had about my own infertility issues. It did a great job of making me feel all the yearning and helplessness again. For me that just made the show better, because while it was a hard period in my life it's something in my rear view mirror and I now have two beautiful daughters. However, I have two close friends who are in their late 30s turning 40 who have never married or had children and are in a serious phase of mourning, because the window is closing for good on the opportunity for biological children. This is not a show I'd recommend for them, since it's too close, too fresh a wound. Timing.

Have you ever taken the Myers-Briggs personality test? I'm nothing but a mass of empathic emotions, so I'm' told - but I already knew that.
And I already knew why I love kdramas - because of emotions it makes me feel. I can watch a favorite drama over and over until the emotion is gone, then I can't watch it anymore.
Why do I love music and cry with every beautiful OST? (Especially the c-drama OSTS.) John Thompson back in the early 1900s explained in his piano method book "Music is the language of emotion". So is good writing, so are good dramas (unless you're a Marvel fan of movies that are void of emotion (imo!).
The interesting thing is I did not watch one, not even one of the dramas you mentioned you watched. I have my own reasons for watching or not watching what I watch, all depending on the "feels".

Stories that hits home motivates me to watch the drama until the end. I love dramas that depict personal and family struggles. I always try to look for lessons on each memorable dramas I have loved and watched. I hold Reply 1988 dear to my heart because I can relate to Dukseon's family struggles. It was the first drama who took me to roller coaster ride of emotions. It reminds me of my parent's youth and longs for the time when life was plain and simple

It was never a pleasant surprise to have a drama suddenly hit my hidden nerve (that I never even knew I have) and turn me into hating it with all my heart. It's even more exasperating when the said dramas didn't have any resemblance to my own life at all. It forced me to reconsider what aspect it has that anger me so much. I'm still questioning myself why I still hold a grudge over Hi Bye Mama despite its overall good quality, while many other dramas with questionable plot holes get my forgiveness not long after it finished.

**Vagabond Series Moral lessons** Off Topic

*Don't Fear
*You can survive a plane crash if you are in the pilot seat while the plane is diving down *there's a secret side door*
*you can go to a nation you've never been before and start monkey kingily parkouring its streets knowing the right way to go without asking
*You can jump off a two storey building onto a moving truck unscathed
*You can also fall off a cliff face first not into the water but on Rocky parts with NO broken bones but just some bicycle scars on you...
*Always sit beside a drunken girl for they will always kiss you and say "you are mine"
*Even If you are a barber you can break into the presidential Villa successfully and the security agents will be told to leave you alone...
*If An assassin comes into your room guns blazing first, pls come out for he'll have a dialogue with you first and then get killed in the process
*Even if you are in the Paul Walker (R.I.P) type accident you'll only come out with a scratch and a drunken master walk and profused breathing
*Always come from an interrogation and directly go to the secret church and immediately call the one person you are being asked about, *don't worry, you won't get caught*
*Even if you were sent the likes of Julio Santana to assassinate you he'll surely run out of bullets trying to get you and in the end later in the process Becoming your Friend...
*You can get stabbed in the thigh deep and still walk like you weren't...
*Lastly
*Remember
*YOU ARE IMMORTAL!!!