I’ve written my thoughts out about the “side” characters in ExtraOrdinary You: Nam Ju [control], Ju Da [challenge/growth] and Do Hwa [noble/wise love].
Thread, y’all.
Okay. Nam Ju is our typical male lead in that he seems to personify the very concept of control. He has taken an interest in our lead female and he demonstrates this (to us, the audience) to the way he controls the scenarios (which is why he also has to be rich and influential). He makes sure the school trip is accessible to her; he buys all the strawberry milks because he knows its her favourite flavour. Depending on how the male lead is written, this can go from one extreme of showing their personality to be manipulative to the other of extremely anxious. On the one hand, he manufactures it so that he can be close to the female lead – manipulative. But on the other, he tries to make sure the situations play out for her own good but in the only way he feels he can – anxious.
Uncertainty of her feelings towards him makes the control tight at the beginning of their relationship and it can feel like a leash.
Which is why we get the big romantic set up – a manufactured situation where it is (hopefully) so good she is compelled to say yes to you because you are presented in such a romantic light. It’s your birthday! And you saved her! And you announced in front of EVERYONE you both know that you have feelings and intentions towards her! She looks amazing! There are fire works! Whoooo, gooooo Nam Ju. How both amazing and vulnerable you have made yourself!
Ju Da is the epitome of growth. There is a reason people find Candy characters boring – they’re so good, they’re untrue. In real life, they don’t survive long – hard-working people pleasers become somebody else’s door mats. So the role of the female lead being paired with the male lead is for him to be such an obvious (enamoured) ass that she can stand up to him and grow as a person/character. She learns, through watching him, how protect and stand up for the ones she loves (including herself!), even up against those she should cower against and defer to. I mean, once you’ve made it through Level 100 Makjang Mother-in-Law, what can’t you do? While she softens the spiky male lead, he (in a well balanced drama – often this character development is sacrificed for the male lead’s) sharpens her and gives her a bit of edge. Which is why she chooses him – because she is now at a point where (confident of his feelings for her), she can make a choice. It (quite often) may not be one we approve of (“He’s an ASS!”) but it is hers and she is able to make it assuredly. Unless she is poorly written, in which case the control narrative takes over and she just looks like a doll puppet along for the ride.
Do Hwa. Oh, my sweet, sweet Do Hwa. We claim that the Second Lead suffers from poor timing or bad luck or noble sacrifice when the ultimate reason is that he cannot make the heroine happy. From an outsiders point of view, this love that is gentle and soft is also suffocating. If she accepted Do Hwa’s love, it would blunt and erode Ju Da even more. Note – thought Do Hwa likes Ju Da and admires her and follows her around sweetly, he doesn’t actually do anything for her. He doesn’t protect her from the bullies or video recordings of their classmates when she takes a fall. He pauses before going to look for a lost Ju Da, which is why he is always late(r than Nam Ju, who never needs to even think about taking care of Ju Da’s well-being). He doesn’t make any discernible effort whatsoever to make her life better. He simply…loves her. As she is. In all her humble, down trodden glory.
Which is fine but maybe Ju Da wants (or needs?) more than that. And their relationship to me was summarised in the scene when he tells her:
“You look pretty. But I think you always look pretty.”
Which is fine, Do Hwa my love. But at the same time, maybe once, just once in her Candy-fied life, Ju Da – poor, helpful, looked down upon Ju Da – would like to feel super pretty and to have people stare at her admiringly. And who helped her do that on that night? Nam Ju with the shoes, not Do Hwa (don’t hate me Do Hwa fans, I do love him, I’m just saying).
This love does not stand up for you when the mother in law gives you her (very unwanted and unnecessary opinion) on your life choices.
It doesn’t help you grow.
It doesn’t jump in front of perceived threats and growl threateningly until you learn to do it yourself (or in situations where you can’t do it yourself).
And let’s be honest – that’s what Ju Da needs.
Imagine the future scene:
Nam Ju: I think you should stay home and look after the kids!
Ju Da: That’s nice but actually I wanted to set up a charitable foundation too to help people in socio-economic difficulty. I need to work – it keeps my brain active. We’ll sort the kids out between us – we can afford it!
Do Hwa: It’s going to be so great having a hard working mum look after our beautiful children.
Ju Da: …uh…yeah. Great. Thanks?
Do Hwa’s love is like taffy/chew sweets – it pulls you in and is hard to fight or argue against. Can be suffocating in huge amounts and Taffy + Candy sounds super sweet and like a great idea – but you end up with cavities, nagging pain and some interesting bloodwork results. She’d turn into those quiet married women, having been told for years how lucky she is to marry someone as flawless as Do Hwa.
If she doesn’t want to spend her romantic life being grateful or worshipped, she will choose someone who knows how equally lucky they are to have her
The second lead is usually noble/wise enough to realise that the female lead has chosen someone she feels is good for her and bow out gracefully.
BUT. The interesting thing here is that by changing the scene, Do Hwa has essentially flipped the whole script. Although it was supposedly impromptu, it was also manufactured. Think about it – when else will they be at a situation as equally important or romantic as Nam Ju’s birthday, as he is announced as the birthday boy and he catches her from the cake he had made specially for her in front of everyone? It’s like planning a proposal over Sydney Harbour on New Years Eve when you happen to be on holiday in Australia. It only happens once. So the timing was really messed up.
*rubs hands gleefully for the narrative potential this creates*
So what happens now? Unable to announce his feelings in a way he feels suitable, as well as finding Do Hwa and Ju Da in that seemingly romantic moment, Nam Ju’s control (and his feeling of possession over Ju Da) slipped. He does not have the nobility or wisdom of our Second Lead. So he’s lashing out and tightening control where he can – over A3, the school, and his behaviour towards Ju Da. She’s normally where he can see her at all times or following him as his errand girl but he’s hurt and doesn’t want to see her as he internally licks his wounded pride.
Stripped of the moment that confirmed Nam Ju’s feelings for her and his protection, Ju Da is adrift. She is not interested in reciprocating Do Hwa’s feelings for her but she doesn’t know if Nam Ju like likes her. We see her trailing after him and then stopping – now that he is not manipulating the situation to be closer to her, she has no excuse or reason to follow him. Because if she does, she’s basically just part of the (screaming) crowd and who wants to feel like that about the guy you (might) like? She has no confirmation that he likes her. The growing seedling of Ju Da’s is going through some pretty frosty conditions at a very tender stage – this is normally when the male lead starts putting in a LOT of effort to convince her he’s not fooling around and is sincere. Plus, he’s being mean mean to her now, instead of the pretend mean and that feels…different. Distant.
Maybe he’s hoping she will try to come to him to confirm her feelings and dispel his doubt but she can’t – the social gap between them is too big and only the male lead has the power (and control) to bridge it.
You can’t expect a Candy to build a bridge over a foaming river of fan girls, disapproving mother-in-law and societal derision (‘gold digger!’) by pure pluck alone, can you? The arrogance, wealth and influence of the male lead has always been integral to that formula and pushing their narrative forward.
But now we just have Ju Da staring longingly after a brooding male lead. *snorrrre*
And if that basically sounds like the plot of a lot of Twilight, you understand why I didn’t watch it.
Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk! 😅😅
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Saner
October 18, 2019 at 11:32 PM
I’ve written my thoughts out about the “side” characters in ExtraOrdinary You: Nam Ju [control], Ju Da [challenge/growth] and Do Hwa [noble/wise love].
Thread, y’all.
Saner
October 18, 2019 at 11:33 PM
Okay. Nam Ju is our typical male lead in that he seems to personify the very concept of control. He has taken an interest in our lead female and he demonstrates this (to us, the audience) to the way he controls the scenarios (which is why he also has to be rich and influential). He makes sure the school trip is accessible to her; he buys all the strawberry milks because he knows its her favourite flavour. Depending on how the male lead is written, this can go from one extreme of showing their personality to be manipulative to the other of extremely anxious. On the one hand, he manufactures it so that he can be close to the female lead – manipulative. But on the other, he tries to make sure the situations play out for her own good but in the only way he feels he can – anxious.
Uncertainty of her feelings towards him makes the control tight at the beginning of their relationship and it can feel like a leash.
Which is why we get the big romantic set up – a manufactured situation where it is (hopefully) so good she is compelled to say yes to you because you are presented in such a romantic light. It’s your birthday! And you saved her! And you announced in front of EVERYONE you both know that you have feelings and intentions towards her! She looks amazing! There are fire works! Whoooo, gooooo Nam Ju. How both amazing and vulnerable you have made yourself!
Saner
October 18, 2019 at 11:34 PM
Ju Da is the epitome of growth. There is a reason people find Candy characters boring – they’re so good, they’re untrue. In real life, they don’t survive long – hard-working people pleasers become somebody else’s door mats. So the role of the female lead being paired with the male lead is for him to be such an obvious (enamoured) ass that she can stand up to him and grow as a person/character. She learns, through watching him, how protect and stand up for the ones she loves (including herself!), even up against those she should cower against and defer to. I mean, once you’ve made it through Level 100 Makjang Mother-in-Law, what can’t you do? While she softens the spiky male lead, he (in a well balanced drama – often this character development is sacrificed for the male lead’s) sharpens her and gives her a bit of edge. Which is why she chooses him – because she is now at a point where (confident of his feelings for her), she can make a choice. It (quite often) may not be one we approve of (“He’s an ASS!”) but it is hers and she is able to make it assuredly. Unless she is poorly written, in which case the control narrative takes over and she just looks like a doll puppet along for the ride.
Saner
October 18, 2019 at 11:55 PM
Do Hwa. Oh, my sweet, sweet Do Hwa. We claim that the Second Lead suffers from poor timing or bad luck or noble sacrifice when the ultimate reason is that he cannot make the heroine happy. From an outsiders point of view, this love that is gentle and soft is also suffocating. If she accepted Do Hwa’s love, it would blunt and erode Ju Da even more. Note – thought Do Hwa likes Ju Da and admires her and follows her around sweetly, he doesn’t actually do anything for her. He doesn’t protect her from the bullies or video recordings of their classmates when she takes a fall. He pauses before going to look for a lost Ju Da, which is why he is always late(r than Nam Ju, who never needs to even think about taking care of Ju Da’s well-being). He doesn’t make any discernible effort whatsoever to make her life better. He simply…loves her. As she is. In all her humble, down trodden glory.
Which is fine but maybe Ju Da wants (or needs?) more than that. And their relationship to me was summarised in the scene when he tells her:
“You look pretty. But I think you always look pretty.”
Which is fine, Do Hwa my love. But at the same time, maybe once, just once in her Candy-fied life, Ju Da – poor, helpful, looked down upon Ju Da – would like to feel super pretty and to have people stare at her admiringly. And who helped her do that on that night? Nam Ju with the shoes, not Do Hwa (don’t hate me Do Hwa fans, I do love him, I’m just saying).
This love does not stand up for you when the mother in law gives you her (very unwanted and unnecessary opinion) on your life choices.
It doesn’t help you grow.
It doesn’t jump in front of perceived threats and growl threateningly until you learn to do it yourself (or in situations where you can’t do it yourself).
And let’s be honest – that’s what Ju Da needs.
Imagine the future scene:
Nam Ju: I think you should stay home and look after the kids!
Ju Da: That’s nice but actually I wanted to set up a charitable foundation too to help people in socio-economic difficulty. I need to work – it keeps my brain active. We’ll sort the kids out between us – we can afford it!
Do Hwa: It’s going to be so great having a hard working mum look after our beautiful children.
Ju Da: …uh…yeah. Great. Thanks?
Do Hwa’s love is like taffy/chew sweets – it pulls you in and is hard to fight or argue against. Can be suffocating in huge amounts and Taffy + Candy sounds super sweet and like a great idea – but you end up with cavities, nagging pain and some interesting bloodwork results. She’d turn into those quiet married women, having been told for years how lucky she is to marry someone as flawless as Do Hwa.
If she doesn’t want to spend her romantic life being grateful or worshipped, she will choose someone who knows how equally lucky they are to have her
The second lead is usually noble/wise enough to realise that the female lead has chosen someone she feels is good for her and bow out gracefully.
Saner
October 18, 2019 at 11:56 PM
BUT. The interesting thing here is that by changing the scene, Do Hwa has essentially flipped the whole script. Although it was supposedly impromptu, it was also manufactured. Think about it – when else will they be at a situation as equally important or romantic as Nam Ju’s birthday, as he is announced as the birthday boy and he catches her from the cake he had made specially for her in front of everyone? It’s like planning a proposal over Sydney Harbour on New Years Eve when you happen to be on holiday in Australia. It only happens once. So the timing was really messed up.
*rubs hands gleefully for the narrative potential this creates*
Saner
October 19, 2019 at 12:00 AM
So what happens now? Unable to announce his feelings in a way he feels suitable, as well as finding Do Hwa and Ju Da in that seemingly romantic moment, Nam Ju’s control (and his feeling of possession over Ju Da) slipped. He does not have the nobility or wisdom of our Second Lead. So he’s lashing out and tightening control where he can – over A3, the school, and his behaviour towards Ju Da. She’s normally where he can see her at all times or following him as his errand girl but he’s hurt and doesn’t want to see her as he internally licks his wounded pride.
Stripped of the moment that confirmed Nam Ju’s feelings for her and his protection, Ju Da is adrift. She is not interested in reciprocating Do Hwa’s feelings for her but she doesn’t know if Nam Ju like likes her. We see her trailing after him and then stopping – now that he is not manipulating the situation to be closer to her, she has no excuse or reason to follow him. Because if she does, she’s basically just part of the (screaming) crowd and who wants to feel like that about the guy you (might) like? She has no confirmation that he likes her. The growing seedling of Ju Da’s is going through some pretty frosty conditions at a very tender stage – this is normally when the male lead starts putting in a LOT of effort to convince her he’s not fooling around and is sincere. Plus, he’s being mean mean to her now, instead of the pretend mean and that feels…different. Distant.
Maybe he’s hoping she will try to come to him to confirm her feelings and dispel his doubt but she can’t – the social gap between them is too big and only the male lead has the power (and control) to bridge it.
You can’t expect a Candy to build a bridge over a foaming river of fan girls, disapproving mother-in-law and societal derision (‘gold digger!’) by pure pluck alone, can you? The arrogance, wealth and influence of the male lead has always been integral to that formula and pushing their narrative forward.
But now we just have Ju Da staring longingly after a brooding male lead. *snorrrre*
And if that basically sounds like the plot of a lot of Twilight, you understand why I didn’t watch it.
Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk! 😅😅