Bros on Foot: Episode 5

by stroopwafel

The guys hit the road and traverse New Zealand’s South Island to meet their next challenge head on, and it’s their cutest and furriest mission yet.

 
EPISODE 5

It’s the staff versus the cast in the first round of the Ha Jung-woo game (a.k.a. the modified version of the 3-6-9 clapping game). Though only $5 is at stake right now, you can cut the tension with a knife. They don’t even make it deep into the game before Ji-hoon claps when he shouldn’t have, and any remaining confidence the guys had just vanishes into the ether.

But just as I start to worry they won’t win any spending money, the $10 round starts and a staffer slips up. Jung-woo finally has a smile on his face, and Ji-hoon consoles the staffer who slips up and dubs him “Tenny” hyung. It looks like practicing didn’t help the staff as much as they might’ve hoped, and when a junior PD named Joon-young loses the $20 round for the staff team, she’s not willing to accept the loss.

She pleads for another chance, and though she gets a consolation hug from Min-ho, all she cares about is the game. Mid-hug, she yells out, “I’ll die.” That comment sends Lee PD into a full-body laugh, and as adorable as Joon-young PD’s pleas are (she even offers to pay them out of pocket for another chance) the guys don’t let anything slide and they move to the next round.

$50 is at stake now; they manage to finish one revolution before someone makes a mistake. It’s poor Tenny hyung, again. The cast is euphoric with Ji-hoon and Min-ho even doing a little victory dance. When Ji-hoon’s finished dancing, he kneels down and gives Tenny hyung a giant hug while murmuring, “I love you, baby. I love you.” Poor Tenny can’t even enjoy the hug, he’s just clutching his head while Joon-young PD wails, “What’s going on? We practiced!”

I swear I can hear the desperation in Lee PD’s voice when she asks to switch out players before the final round lol. Ji-hoon won’t hear of it at first, but then he tells her even if they do switch someone, he can’t give up Tenny hyung. “He’s mine, he’s my fave.” Lee PD appeals on behalf of Tenny hyung, though, and points out how tense and nervous he looks. This time the guys have mercy and agree to a switch — if Lee PD adds $10 to the prize pot lol. She agrees right away and Tenny hyung gets a reprieve.

Now it’s time to win or lose $110. They barely get started when Joon-young PD makes a decisive mistake: she claps a second too late. This time, though, Lee PD snatches up the money away from the cast and Joon-young goes all in to beg for another chance. She gets a hug from Ji-hoon instead and he spins her around for good measure too. Min-ho even points out that the staff is being extra tricksy and that he heard someone give Joon-young a cue to clap. Joon-young PD isn’t even listening though — she just drops to her knees in desperation and Ji-hoon goes down with her and gives her another little hug. But then he softens and Jung-woo says maybe they should give the staff another chance heh.

The guys all agree to let the mistake slide as long as they can keep the extra $10 as a bonus. Lee PD agrees right away and they start up again for a final, final round. The game has barely started when Ji-hoon slips up. This time, Lee PD and the staff are the picture of happiness but the cast… They’re distraught and they start to ask for another chance (how the tables have turned). Jin-gu attempts to barter their extra $10 to play another round, while the hyungs go into full-blown tantrums. Ji-hoon, all 6’2″ of him, flails on the grass in his little Ugg booties.

Lee PD gives in and tells them they can do a final, final, final round. (Have they been looking at how I name my writing files?) It’s death-match time: Min-ho and Jin-gu vs. Joon-young PD and a cameraman. They go around and around for a surprisingly long time before someone slips up — and the cast emerge victorious.

Their reaction is hilarious — it’s like they won the World Cup and Olympics all in one. Flush with cash, they take a breather and receive their next mission note. It’s a cryptic and pithy message: Drive to the given address and find Laura by 3pm. The address in the note is a couple of hundred miles away, but they have plenty of time so they make a pit stop at a little town named Twizel that’s en route.

Twizel is well-known as a tourist town and it feels positively urban compared to the campsites the men have been using the past few days. They wander around the marketplace and when they reach the cafe, they buy themselves a little treat of coffee and meat pies. Jung-woo says it feels weird being among people again and ordering food for themselves. They visit a supermarket before departing and even when they have plenty of money, what to eat and buy always seems to be something that requires a lot of deliberation and discussion.

They settle on having hamburgers and pasta for their next two meals and buy all the ingredients. My favorite part of seeing them grocery shopping has to be Ji-hoon’s reaction to seeing cheap avocados for sale. Avocados are really popular in Korea but super expensive, and I can feel his excitement through the screen at the prospect of a bargain. He’s so excited that he decides to make homemade guacamole for dinner.

Back on the road, the guys chat about the scenery and Min-ho notes that the weather is nice and warm, perfect for a nap — “SNORK,” sayeth Ji-hoon. While the other three were chatting, Ji-hoon had been fast asleep and in an instance of perfect timing, he interrupted their chat and woke up at the sound of his own honking snore lol.

Their quest to find Laura comes to an end at a farm with vast fields. Laura is the owner of the ginormous farm they’ve just arrived at. She raises thousands of sheep, cows, alpaca, and other furry creatures. To earn three Dream Tickets, the men will be helping out on the farm for the day to get a taste of local life beyond the touristy side of New Zealand.

Laura has boots ready for them since farmwork can get dirty, and Jung-woo looks like he’s worried already lol. He’s not worried about the work though — he’s worried none of the boots will fit him, like the bike helmet. (I love this recurring thread of Jung-woo being haunted by his too-small bike helmet from the first day’s mission.) But Jin-gu sweetly searches out the biggest pair for him, and they fit!

We get to meet Laura’s colleague, Soul, an adorable and hard-working border collie. Though Soul is usually in charge of rounding up the farm’s sheep, today it’s up to the guys to move the sheep from one pen to another. From the way Laura laughs after giving the task, you know it’s not going to be an easy mission.

The guys decide to rely on Min-ho to communicate with the sheep since he was born in the Year of the Sheep. Jin-gu: “How are the sheep feeling today?” Min-ho susses out that, “They’re in a great mood.” Flaming Charisma Min-ho is back, and the show cues up an amazing song whenever Min-ho starts to rev up and run, and it’s appropriately passionate and charismatic. He and the others shepherd the flock toward the gate with the sheep slowly moving in the right direction. Then the sheep start to run — just not towards the gate. They’re ridiculously fast runners and spry jumpers.

Picture a game of tag played by humans and sheep and you’ll have a good idea of what the men are going through as they attempt to herd the little guys into the next pen. Ji-hoon worries about Soul and totally isn’t tired of herding the sheep as he wonders aloud, “Aren’t we stealing the dog’s job?”

Ji-hoon comes up with a new plan, to move slowly and gently instead of running to herd the flock. I think he might be the sheep whisperer, because his approach of standing in place when the sheep stare at him works. The others follow Ji-hoon’s lead and they go from playing tag to Red Light, Green Light. At last, they usher their furry little buddies into the pen successfully. After fist bumping and mamma mia-ing each other, they move to their next task.

They need to feed hay to Laura’s alpaca, sheep, and deer, so they load up a tractor with bales of hay. Laura hops on to drive the tractor and asks three of them to sit on the bale so that one person can close the gate. Jin-gu politely gives up a seat to Min-ho so the three hyungs sit — but it’s a trap. Laura drives off with them sitting and it’s kind of a bumpy ride. Jin-gu looks elated at not being on the back of a giant farm vehicle. Jung-woo looks like he’s nauseated, even though Ji-hoon is holding him and Min-ho tight to make sure they don’t slip. The ride only lasts seconds and then they meet the cutest little animal friends.

Alpacas and sheep sidle up to the cast and though the sheep are a little shy, the alpacas are eating out of the guys’ hands. Jung-woo is the only person standing off to the side, getting startled whenever an animal runs past him. He does say that the alpacas are really cute, but he seems a little scared to get too up close and personal with them.

On the other hand, Ji-hoon is taking to farm life quickly. Apart from being the sheep whisperer, Laura needs someone to lob a big bale of hay into the deer pen, and he throws it like it’s nothing. (I think I could maybe throw a box of tissues like that. Maybe.) They only have one task left on their to-do list: grooming horses. They have to clean out the hooves and brush the coats of two horses, one regular sized and one miniature sized. Why is all of this so cute?

Their tasks complete, Laura shares that she didn’t always live on the farm. Burned out by corporate life, she packed it all in for the farm life, and she’s never been happier. The guys are free to camp on her farm for the night and she hopes that they love the farm as much as she does.

On their way back to their SUV the guys see some sheep running free when they should be in their pen. Ji-hoon frets, “This means Soul will have to work overtime.” They decide to help out one last time before they clock off. The sheep are unwieldy as ever but after lots of running the sheep are finally back where they should be. Clocking off for real this time, Jung-woo is pleased to have finished, but the state of everyone’s sneakers is another matter. “I think we stepped on a lot of sheep crap.” Ji-hoon humblebrags, “I dodged it all,” and Jung-woo parrots him in this really sing-songy way that feels very sibling-like lol.

Dinner tonight is cream pasta a la Jung-woo, and guacamole a la Ji-hoon. The cast must be famished because all they can focus on is cooking quickly. Jung-woo slices all his ingredients up quickly and cooks the bacon, mushrooms, and sauce all together to cut down on cooking time. Ji-hoon gets to work making guacamole and improvises ingredients as needed. Ji-hoon’s so sweet — he checks in with Jung-woo on whether or not he can handle a touch of tabasco sauce (he can). Everything is done in a jiffy but there’s still more waiting to be done. After plating the pasta and set the table for dinner, the cameramen step forward to shoot the food. The cast practically breath down their necks, as if willing time to go faster. Ultimately the cameramen retreat and the guys can begin eating their huge helpings of cream pasta with bacon, plus fresh guacamole and chips as well.

Everything is wonderful except for the weather; it’s surprisingly cold and Jung-woo seems tired of camping and eating outdoors. He wonders, “Is there a hotel experience on the cards?” Min-ho says they should propose playing a game for it. Ji-hoon muses about other games they could play, maybe long distance running? Ji-hoon’s in — he’s positive they’d win and it should be for $1000. Jung-woo worries that there could be a long-distance runner hidden among the staff. Ji-hoon: “Then we’ll just tackle them from behind.” They’ve tasted victory once, so how bad could their other allowance missions be?

Epilogue
Though Jung-woo seemed scared of alpacas during feeding time, appearances can be deceiving. As they walk back to their SUV post-mission, he’s disappointed there are no alpacas running around — he wanted to play with them. In a talking head, he says he can finally reveal this for the first time: He loves alpacas. The sheep are cute too, and he’s also fond of camels. The alpacas in particular though, since they look like dolls. He gets caught up in questions, like how can he adopt one and take it home with him? Would he be able to raise an alpaca at home?

 
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