Sunbae Don’t Put on That Lipstick: Episodes 7-8 Open Thread
by missvictrix
Chemistry is in the air, but Sunbae does a nice job of showing us how love isn’t always as simple as just liking someone. While both of our characters have their baggage from the past, and challenges in the present, what’s really on the table this week is the delicate dance going on between them.
EPISODES 7-8 WEECAP
The more Song-ah and Hyun-seung get to know each other, the more they click. Hyun-seung knows it, Song-ah knows it, and we know it. The friction between them at the start of the drama — and the harshness from Hyun-seung — is addressed frequently, and explained and talked through so much that I really like the perspective the early parts of our story are given.
Hyun-seung admits he was selfish and harsh, and it’s an interesting bit of self-awareness. It’s also very different from the Hyun-seung we see as the drama progresses. His softness and devotion towards Song-ah is delightful and adorable. I could watch their conversations and moments on endless repeat.
Last week’s episodes ended with Song-ah and Hyun-seung pulling their all-nighter. Outside of all the surface-level cuteness (in this scene, and all of them really), I like how each scene also shows some internal truth, or emotional shift. For instance, at the warehouse we again see Hyun-seung’s utter care for Song-ah: he runs out into the torrential rain to get a blanket for Song-ah to rest on, since she’s falling asleep at the table.
His warmth and tenderness affect Song-ah as much as you might expect, and she returns that tenderness to him, dabbing his soaked hair with a towel (I object to the unnatural method of towel-drying in this scene, but it’s a drama thing, so I’ll let it go). As cute as it is, this shared moment also causes Song-ah to take a step back from him. He praises her and her character, but Song-ah responds that Hyun-seung’s heart is “too big for her to accept.” It’s an interesting and authentic reaction as she sees how deeply he cares for her.
It’s a bit of a turn-down, too, but Hyun-seung doesn’t change his actions that much. The two are still very much thrown together (at work and on the weekends) and each encounter continues their dance. Hyun-seung tells Song-ah that as long as they can still be close, he won’t pressure her and that he’ll “maintain a distance” if that’s what she wants. But can he really manage that? It’s not as easy as it sounds. He wants more, for sure, but it’s the return of his own ex-girlfriend that makes him think about his stance in a new light.
Much like the overseas work opportunity, the returning ex-girlfriend trope is one that I often dread. However, much like it handled the first trope, Sunbae takes a pretty light touch here as well. It also doesn’t save this trope for the final few episodes, which leaves me grateful. Instead, the return of Hyun-seung’s ex serves a few purposes: a) it makes his own experience more real for Song-ah, which brings them even closer; b) it shows how Hyun-seung is in high demand (duh!); c) and most importantly, it shakes him up.
I can’t equate it in my head, but his ex insists on taking him back, and when he refuses, likens it to his own unrequited love for Song-ah. Hyun-seung’s perspective shifts. Being pursued by a women who has hurt him and he wants nothing to do with makes him think about his own pursuit of Song-ah. This leads to one of the major shifts in their relationship: Hyun-seung tells Song-ah he’s changed his mind. He can’t be content keeping his distance. Instead, he will try to get over her. And he does this by putting up a wall.
It’s not until this wall is built that Song-ah realizes how much she’s enjoyed getting closer to him, and I love how well the drama captured the feeling of being removed from someone’s life who you were very much involved in only days ago. Quite rightly, it gives Song-ah perspective, and we end our episodes this week with her telling him not to move on. Swoon central!
I haven’t recounted the hundreds of cute moments between them this week — not because they weren’t great, but because all the internal shifts they caused were even more interesting than the moments themselves.
We also see quite a bit more of Hyun-seung’s sisters this week. For Yeon-seung’s storyline, and her husband and the mysterious chef, boy are they hanging fire with this plot! I’m still not completely sure where they’re going so I don’t want to call it, but I’m hoping for the best outcomes for Yeon-seung and her precocious and wonderful daughter.
Ji-seung’s storyline is a little lighter — she continues to be pursued by Jae-woon, who someone manages to catch her eye through his weird buffoonery. That being said, he seems genuinely smitten.
As for Hyo-joo and Jae-shin, they are marching ahead with their marriage despite the flashing red alarms going off in every scene, clueing us into the fact that this is not a great idea. Still, the more we see of these two the more I think they do indeed understand each other, however dysfunctional that is.
At this point in the drama, the storylines are still very much separate (especially the Chae siblings), and as we lean into the second half of the drama, I’m expecting a lot more confluence. And maybe even some louder drama, since the last few episodes have had more internally focused plot movement. It’s not exactly a “brace for impact” feeling, but in a way, I am anyway. There’s a lot of pieces and a lot of plot lines, still to come together. But as long as they don’t drive too deep of a wedge between Hyun-seung and Song-ah, we’ll have to let them come.
RELATED POSTS
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- Kim Ro-woon relentlessly, romantically pursues Won Jin-ah in new JTBC office drama
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Tags: Ahn Se-ha, Choi Jung-won, Kim Ro-woon, Lee Hyun-wook, Lee Joo-bin, Lee Kyu-han, Sunbae Don't Put on That Lipstick, Wang Bit-na, Won Jin-ah
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1 John Lloyd
February 11, 2021 at 10:22 PM
I love this show so much thanks for the recap!
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2 Kurama
February 11, 2021 at 11:47 PM
I really like how Hyun Seung is honest with his feelings. He always says what he thinks or feels. During the ramyeon scene, he said it wasn't shaken by his ex and it was true, he was shaken by their conversation about an unrequited love. There were a lot of scenes where we could see them feeling confortable together, laughing, so when he stopped being friend with her, the difference of behavior was really big.
We could see how Song-A cares about him but she always said it was as a sunbae, for the first time, she accepted it was more. The last OST "I Live in Your Eyes" is really great and matches really well her character.
Jae-Shin showed some growth, he accepted Song-A's choice and respected it. I wonder if they come clean, his couple with Hyo-Joo has a chance.
I loved the coworkers! Each one with a different theory : crush, dating or flirting. I think they all are a little bit right :P It's nice to see them supportive :D
There is a good balance between swoony moments (the elavator, the running, the rainy scenes) and serious conversations that make our character evolve.
The actors are really great in their role. It's funny to see them having difficulties to say their cringey lines :D
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3 sailorgirl
February 12, 2021 at 1:18 AM
I was taken aback by how feral Hyo Joo looked in the split second before Hyun Seung stepped in. I had no doubt in my mind that she was ready to tear Song Ah to pieces. Jae Shin was clearly in denial by thinking that he could have a second life in Europe without her knowledge. Hyo Joo has keen senses and she definitely knows that Jae Shin doesn't love her, but he's pretty to look at and she's willing to settle for his forced allegiance.
I keep coming back to the conversation with her grandfather. I think another reason for the disdain that he shows Jae Shin is due to the position Hyo Joo put herself, and therefore the family in. By being so hooked on winning Jae Shin, she's inadvertently brought the family low, so to speak, and given power to a man who is not even from their social strati. Hence, the grandfather goes out of his way to remind Jae Shin that he is nothing and does not have power, irrespective of Hyo Joo's feelings.
I think she sees Jae Shin as trustworthy and someone reliable. Hyo Joo saying that he was the only one there for her struck me, as though despite all her bravado she's desperate for something real and stable to cling to.
On that note, I loved how she handled Jae Shin's father's pretense, and hope she won't exploit the man's shameless selfishness to her benefit. Even though, let's be honest, she probably will.
Truth be told, I hate seeing Jae Shin's dad onscreen and feel like sinking into the ground from second-hand embarrassment whenever he speaks. Jae Shin was clearly hurt when his father took the money. Despite their history, he expected some resistance, but it turned out that his father is a cretin-leech and will keep pestering Jae Shin until he's tapped him dry. The man is awful and makes it easy to understand why Jae Shin is so desperate to claw out of the hole he was born into. Even so, hurting people in the process cannot be tolerated. However, I am glad that he and Song Ah amicably put their relationship to rest this week. Please, please stay that way.
Thank you for the recap!!
Stray Observations:
🎀 Two Noona romances for the price of one! I am so IN. Ji Seung and Jae Woon are adorable as are the main duo.
🎀 Did the husband and the chef bury a body together? Yikes.
🎀 Calling it now, Ga Young is the Red Masked Avenger. I see it fitting her character perfectly!
🎀 Ironically, it took seeing his clingy ex for Hyun Seung to realize that unrequited love is not his jam. I knew she would pop up eventually and ended up being glad that her appearance pushed the quasi-couple closer together. So, so glad for his transparency.
🎀 I officially have the biggest crush on Ro Woon, please send help.
🎀 Fingers, toes and pinkies crossed for some kissing next week, I wholeheartedly ship Hyun Seung and Song Ah!
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Kurama
February 12, 2021 at 1:35 AM
Rowoon is killing it in this role. I really liked how he acted in the rameyon scene his "are you worried" and "why" had so much meaning.
In Extraordinary You, his character didn't have any clothes than his school uniform (poor him), now he can try any style and looks so good!
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sailorgirl
February 12, 2021 at 2:25 AM
@kurama Yeah he does! This is the first show I've seen him in and he's doing great.
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 8:04 AM
I actually gained some real respect for Hyo-joo this week. She knows Jae-shin does not love her (but hopes in time he will) but she also knows him because he is her brother's friend. I suspect that the 'love is not for her' attitude reflects some bad past relationships and even the experiences of her family life.
As for her Grandfather- he has been manipulated just as much as Jae-shin has and he hates it: It is not just because Jae-shin is lower class. Yet, in locking the hyper-competent Jae-shin into the company Hyo-joo has actually done him and her family a major favor- in a way she has accomplished the significant alliance building that is the purpose of a high class daughter.
But it was the way that she handled Jae-shin's father that told me that Hyo-joo is absolutely no dummy. She is a smart girl and is marrying Jae-shin for calculated reasons: She will have much greater control over her own life with him than she ever would have with any other potential husband. And she has a lot to offer- including that fact that sometime in the future she will make sure that he becomes the Chairman of the company. First step: change his image by changing his suits.
If she looked feral at the elevator it is because Song-ah could be a major threat to her plans- this is a visceral reaction she is having. Fortunately Hyung-seung was there to save the day not only for Song-ah but also Jae-shin and, yes, even Hyo-joo.
When the drama began we were led to believe that Hyo-joo was essentially crazy but in fact this is not true- in fact she is ambitious and hyper-rational. Jae-shin may not be marrying for love but he will in time I hope come to appreciate his extraordinary life partner. This relationship may be emotionally dysfunctional but in time it will become reasonably functional even at that level- it can be a good marriage even if it is not a romantic one.
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isa: I'm not a serial killer I'm just really passionate about things
February 12, 2021 at 8:55 AM
Oh! I agree with ALL of this! Ive been saying since last week that Hyo-joo would br a dangerous enemy to have. I firmly believe that suicide attempt was a calculated risk to bring Lee Jae Shin to heel and every time she looks at Song-Ah its not as a love rival but as someone that she may have to permanently remove. Soon. Girl is dangerous. I dont really like marriage or political dramas but I feel like LJS and HJ coming together in marriage would be some compelling entertainment.
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 10:07 AM
If you remember the flashback scene when we are shown Jae-shin arriving at the hospital room after Hyo-joo's 'suicide' attempt you might remember that the Chairman is rushing out of that room- and he is totally pissed off. Hyo-joo did not do it just to manipulate Jae-shin, it was equally about manipulating her grandfather- and grandfather knows it and that is why he resents Jae-shin. Grandfather is not lying when he says Jae-shin is too low class but that is not the real reason he is mad.
The girl is extremely dangerous and that is why Hyung-seung is almost as important to Jae-shin as he is to Song-ah. Because Hyung-seung removes Song-ah as a threat to Hyo-joo that in turn means that Jae-shin's past relationship to Song-ah has been neutralized.
Hyo-joo is indeed very dangerous and Jae-shin has to remember this. But as long as he does then he is an extremely fortunate man because having someone as dangerous as Hyo-joo on your side is like being backed up by force of nature. As just one example- Hyo-joo can actually protect him from his father. That massive burden on his life has been removed.
He may be afraid that Hyo-joo will treat him like a puppet but to me it seems unlikely. Hyo-joo, like her brother, actually values him. She would not insist on marrying him if she did not. She will put her foot down at times and insist on her way- like with the change in his clothing (note: her brother agrees with that)- but when she does she will probably be right- as she actually is over his suits. But she actually appreciates and values his business knowledge and judgement. She would not want to marry him if she did not.
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sailorgirl
February 13, 2021 at 10:19 AM
@isthatacorner I know! Is it crazy that I think she could be good for him? They both seem to know what they want out of life and being together is a way to achieve those goals. I just think Song Ah should run and never look back, Hyo Joo seems to be of the strike first and ask questions later approach. So any ambiguity surrounding Song Ah's relationship with Jae Shin would be best abandoned.
Hyo Joo wears a thin veil of civility, with something truly dangerous simmering beneath.
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sailorgirl
February 13, 2021 at 10:36 AM
@oldawyer I do think they are well suited. The scene with Hyo Joo and Jae Shin's father confirmed that, although I maintain that she is unstable. The hyper-rational aspect is true, but Hyo Joo seems to be a woman who knows what her life is supposed to be like and will tolerate few deviation from the plan.
She's made a wise choice with Jae Shin because he wouldn't keep her from doing as she pleases, or pursuing her career, and she has real feelings for him. Albeit very controlling, she's suitable for Jae Shin. More so than Song Ah who was like a mother figure of sorts, encouraging him and soothing his ego when things went awry. She was a good girlfriend, but could never have handled the complicated nature of his life. He never trusted her enough to let her in, knowing subliminally that this was not a role she could fill. Whereas, Hyo Joo takes it on her chin, if anything appreciating Jae Shin's father because she can understand why her husband to be is the way that he is. This is a union brought about by entirely the wrong methods, but it will be fortuitous for them both.
My only reserve is any fallout directed at Hyun Seung and Song Ah should her plans start to fail, or Jae Shin default in his role.
She would lash out and take everyone down with her. In this I worry for Ji Seung because her relationship with Jae Woon might be in jeopardy once Hyo Joo figures out the interconnectedness of their relationships.
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candilane
February 13, 2021 at 10:50 AM
Dont you think that Jae Shin is going to self destruct thought due to his greed? I dont think he will let Song A go as easily as we are seeing, I mean he already showed up to her house.
I honestly think he doesnt think he is " good enough " for Song A even though she is not from a wealthy family. Kinda ironic isnt it?
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sailorgirl
February 13, 2021 at 11:54 AM
@candiland I don't believe he thinks he is good enough for anyone. There are some deep self-esteem issues with Jae Shin that the show has yet to delve into, but it is clear that he doesn't know how to fully give of himself emotionally.
His relationship with Song Ah worked because he was on the receiving end of her affection; the attention and care she paid him was like a balm. In a different way, Hyo Joo is also the one giving more in the relationship, offering him class elevation, opportunities and connection, while Jae Shin simply brings his knowledge of business.
He seems to have faith in his business capabilities, yet due to his poor upbringing, doesn't know how to properly love. Otherwise, he would not have continued seeing Song Ah after getting engaged or planned to have a second life with her in Europe after his marriage to Hyo Joo. It's clear that something very important is missing in Jae Shin, perhaps empathy, but he is wise enough to know when to back off. His face after seeing Hyo Joo's reaction to Song Ah at the elevator said it all. He may have lingering attachment to his subordinate, but Jae Shin is a survivalist and will drop all those feelings if they stand in the way of progress.
The only time this isn't true is with his father, since we see that he repeatedly bails him out of prison and handles his never-ending debt. I think that is the one tie Jae Shin allowed himself to have, but he recently tried to dissolve that relationship. Granted, for good cause.
He has no other friends aside from Jae Woon and his sole focus is advancing in business. He enjoyed having the positive affirmation from Song Ah and their relationship, but it would be a clear choice if it came down to picking her or getting further ahead in the company. Even possibly becoming chairman, as another user mentioned.
His greed might be the thing that saves him. At least until he deals with his past trauma and associated issues.
4 vlinder
February 12, 2021 at 4:49 AM
I really love the weecap. Especially the observations about the ex-returning and the dance going on between HS and SA. I didn’t expect the turn in their love story though … but it makes sense. SA needed to become aware that HS has filled in a space in her life (hopefully also in her heart).
This week I stumbled over words (expressions). I stumbled over the words of HS’s heart being too big for her to accept. Did it mean that she notes that he loves her more and she can’t reciprocate to the same extent (yet) or at all? Did it mean that she notes that he loves her and she’s not ready to feel like that so soon? What did it mean? I feel the dance we saw between them revolved around those words. Like she needed to realize what she felt for him and that she could respect him like a man. Like he needed to crawl out from under the shell as a little brother. I felt like having his product win and seeing him in a setting where he was the sunbae helped with that (next to the three points you mentioned above, being in demand etc).
I also love what she said at the end about not being able to hold herself to the boundary he had set in their relationship because she enjoyed being around him too much. I found it interesting that she termed herself as a “bad person.” If I am a bad person so be it! It made me think about why she would see herself as bad. Maybe because she wasn’t sure if she liked him like he liked her but she did know she wanted to be around him. Perhaps she was aware that it meant she might be playing with his heart. I like how she is discovering her feelings and I like her honesty.
I absolutely love Jae-woon and Ji-seung!! My second favorite pairing! I kept wondering what his reaction would be if he came to know that Ji-seung’s brother was working for him!! The dog scene was too funny and cute!!
I thought the dad had hit a low point last week, but I was wrong. Putting a price tag on the relationship with your son … something that should be priceless!! I have no words … I had no idea you could sink this low with a gambling addiction. Though I deeply dislike the father, the drama does do a good job of depicting it and makes me wonder what caused the dad to go down that route in the first place. What does he think he will gain if he strikes it big?
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bil
February 12, 2021 at 5:29 AM
"Did it mean that she notes that he loves her more and she can’t reciprocate to the same extent (yet) or at all?"
I think SA knows HS likes her so much but she need time to heal, after being betrayed and even have to see her ex almost everyday, she's not ready yet to love another person, but in ep 8 ending we know SA comfortable around HS and in no time she's ready to love him back
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 8:37 AM
When Song-ah describes Hyung-seung as big hearted she did not mean simply that he likes her more. She was actually describing his character. Hyung-seung grew up with a lot of love from his parents and his sisters. He has an unusually large capacity for caring about people and loving them. It is why he so protective of the people he cares about- to the point of utter ruthlessness in protecting them: The brutal but utterly effective way he revealed Jae-shin's two timing to Song-ah in the beginning of this drama stems directly from Hyung-seung's great heart, because nothing but what was absolutely guaranteed to work would be good enough to protect her.
His big heartedness is also why he is so honest.
So when Song-ah says Hyung-seung's heart is too big to accept she is really expressing a sense of inadequacy. She knows that it is actually impossible to love him as much as he loves her and she does not want to accept an unequal relationship. By the end of these episodes she has changed her mind. After all, even if he will always love her more she can still love him as much as she is capable of loving.
Hyung-seung's big-heartedness also explains why his ex might have thought that after three years he might be able to take her back- and she certainly will never find another man like him. But love can not only die, it can be killed and she had done the one thing that can kill it. So it did not surprise me that Hyung-seung would show absolutely no hesitation in telling her to get lost. He has a very strong character and is not going to change his mind once the facts are known. Part of what I love about his character is his dedication to truth.
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Kurama
February 12, 2021 at 12:44 PM
Poor Hyun Seung, his ex broke up with him because he had a happy life and thought he couldn't understand her. It's not his fault if he had a happy life and he shouldn't feel guilty for that. But he's ready to share it. I like how he just shared his friends with Song-A because she didn't have the same student life. He can't change her past but he can change her future.
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Blue (@mayhemf)
February 12, 2021 at 1:07 PM
Yes to everything you said about his big heart.
I think when she said that, she didn’t feel she was good enough for him nor had the confidence to love him in such a pure and carefree/selfless way. But as she spent time with him, she found happiness she never felt before. If she could feel this then she could very well learn to love in ways she had never loved before.
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 5:44 PM
That last point is also true- Over the time that Song-ah is with Hyung-seung and is loved by him her heart will grow, and the longer it goes on the bigger it will grow.
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5 candilane
February 12, 2021 at 6:48 AM
Okay, don't hate me but in some ways I felt sorry for Jae Shin in these episodes and in some ways I couldnt stand him. First, the scene with his Dad and him offering him money ( obviously as a TEST) ripped at me because you could see Jae Shin was hurt by his father not only accepting money to end their relationship but putting a small price on it. You could see that Jae Shin wanted his Dad to choose him. Also, Jae Shin ran to Song A because she is his comfort zone. Next, I didnt like how the Director treated Jae Shin in this episode, he was his friend and kind but wasn't it friendly condescension? Picking out someones clothes and telling them to dress better is messed up too. I dont think he meant to be unkind but it came off as stuck up.
The whole family bothers me in the way they treat Jae Shin. The grandfather, the fiance, even the Director at times but what's worse, Jae Shin seems to accept it. Jae Shin can't seem to recognize his own self worth and talents which is sad.
I adore HS and Song A and I can really see them together long term. I love that their relationship is a slow build. I think Song A will become more open to HS. My favorite scene was when HS took her to meet his college friends and afterwards he said I was cool and Song A looked at him and said Yes.. You could literally feel the chemistry in that scene. My only complaint is the storyline is dragging a bit so I wish it would pick up but I call this a coffee drama.. slow and relaxed. I am definitely enjoying ..
Random: I was mad at Jae shin for the elevator scene. I mean did he really have the audacity to tell Song A to let bygones be bygones and to let it go. I know she agreed because she is trying to move on but talk about RUDE! I'm like he is acting like the victim.. SMH..
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 8:55 AM
Grandfather has been manipulated by Hyo-joo just as much as Jae-shin has so his emotional reaction is very understandable.
But I agree that it is past time for Jae-shin to stop seeing himself as a victim. He has been a victim and has no control over his life but what he needs to see is that the waves of fate are carrying him to a very fortunate place. Emanuel Kant pointed out that our real freedom in life was in how we chose to feel about our circumstances- because the circumstances are usually beyond out control.
The choosing clothes for his is actually an example of this. His friend and his intended are spending serious money on upgrading his image- so that he can become even more fortunate. Not only would gratitude be appropriate but the realization that this is yet another sign that his previously miserable life was taking a turn for the better. If he chooses to remain miserable when he is enjoying good fortune then Kant would call him an utter fool. Those clothes change his visual image and will even help in the process of getting the Chairman to accept him. His friend and his intended know what they are doing.
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Kurama
February 12, 2021 at 10:18 AM
I don't know if the Grandfather was manipulated. I think he knows what Hyo-Joo did and for him it's an issue because it's not about she obtained what she wanted but the fact she was the one begging for Jae-Shin's love and in his family it should be the opposite.
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isa: I'm not a serial killer I'm just really passionate about things
February 12, 2021 at 10:31 AM
But here is the thing, though. If hes a victim its because he made himself one. Hes the one who walked up to the director and asked him (teenaged director) to buy him (lee jae shin). Lee Jae Shin is the one who said, "Ill be your dog for the rest of my life". Teenage director said no, Id rather you be my friend. LJS never took that at face value --even though from what we've seen thats exactly how the director treats him. Sure hes a bit uppity and arrogant at times but hes a chaebol. If LJS told him to knock it off or had come back from abroad with a plan to make himself his own man I dont think the director is the type to have stopped him.
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 10:54 AM
Because of his sociopathic father he was a victim long before that. When he first talked to the his friend that was actually his attempt to start doing something about it. It was because he was a victim in real life that he offered to make a deal.
But he should have started seeing things differently the moment that Jae-woon refused to make the deal that Jae-shin proposed. Instead he made him a much better deal- they would be friends instead of master and dog. Yes there is a power imbalance in their friendship and Jae-shin at times refuses to understand it (while Jae-woon simply accepts it as natural) but the real proof that Jae-woon does NOT see Jae-shin as his dog lies in his readiness and even eagerness to accept him as his brother-in-law. To Jae-woon this is not just about making his sister happy but has the further benefit of vastly reducing the inequality in their friendship.
Jae-shin needs to truly objective see how far he has come and it is long past time to stopp feeling like a victim.
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isa: I'm not a serial killer I'm just really passionate about things
February 12, 2021 at 12:27 PM
Therapy! THERAPY FOR LJS!
OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 12:34 PM
Actually therapy would indeed be a good idea.
candilane
February 13, 2021 at 10:39 AM
I can agree to some extent but I feel like its at the cost at his own self respect. If the circumstances were reversed, I cannot imagine Song A or HS letting other spend lots of money on them to " upgrade " their image. Yes, his life becoming better but at a cost. The cost of himself and his own personal happiness.
Hmm how do I put this, I had an incident where a superior sent a snide email to me at work. My first reaction was anger and I thought should I say something or should I let it go. I decided to reply and ask them to kindly refrain from using language like that in the future because it may be interpreted as discourteous. The reply was in no way disrespectful and I hesitated before I sent it but I decided to send it because I value myself and my own self respect more than a paycheck . This really did happen btw.
Getting back to the point at hand, I wish JS had more self value. I am not even saying dont marry into the family, if that is what he wants but push back, don't let people treat you like crap because they feel that they can.
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Blue (@mayhemf)
February 12, 2021 at 1:12 PM
He is always in the self pitying victim state, he fails to see that he has had choices. He chose this.
And to be honest I do think Jae Woon treats him like a friend. Jae Shin never ever speaks up because he puts himself in the ‘dog’ status on his own accord. It’s only a question of time before he blows up. It’s going to be ugly.
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floressalicis
February 12, 2021 at 2:21 PM
That is the part that irritates me. No question, his dad is awful. But let's also be fair: there are a *lot* of terrible parents out there. One of my friends had a who father walked out when she was extremely young and was basically never part of her life, to the point of saying extremely cruel things to her the few times she tried to reach out (for things like asking if he would attend her graduation, etc). Then he found out she was marrying a son from a rich and prominent Singaporean family....and promptly showed up demanding a bride price for his daughter. He threatened to show up to the wedding, make enough of a noise to embarrass the family, and essentially forced them to pay him off. And yet oddly enough she never spent her life playing the victim or viewing every relationship as necessarily transactional. No doubt, parents can cause a great deal of trauma, but they are not the only humans in a child's life, and for most of us, at some point you are likely to have interacted with enough other humans in your life that you don't get to blame all of your character flaws on your parents anymore.
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isa: I'm not a serial killer I'm just really passionate about things
February 12, 2021 at 4:36 PM
One of the things I remember really reasonating with me in therapy in my late teens/ early 20s and again as an adult living in the world is" oh, you had a bad childhood? Are you still a child? No? Get some therapy and build a bridge. You dont get to use a bad childhood for yoir bad decisions for the rest of your life. At some point you habe to be held accountable for the crap youre doing.
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isa: I'm not a serial killer I'm just really passionate about things
February 12, 2021 at 4:33 PM
I meant to say this earlier-- I think Lee Jae Shin is being written in equal parts sympathetic character, sad sack who DOES have some advantages that hes not using (his friendship with the director) and is losing the woman he actually jad feelings for to marry this chaebol princess he doesnt love who has had a terrible childhood AND a jerk. Hes liiterally ALL THE THINGS!
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6 candilane
February 12, 2021 at 6:53 AM
I think Jae Shin is jealous of HS. HS has the background, looks, fun personality. You can tell its something about HS that really pokes at Jae Shin's ego.
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 9:06 AM
I do not think that Jae-shin actually knows Hyung-seung's background- although the fact that he owns a car would be a hint. But yes he is very jealous of him. Given where his life is now going- and I particularly note the fact that his future wife can handle his dad and protect him from his dad (something Song-ah would never have been able to do)- it is high time that he stopped being jealous. He has it good now.
And he needs to appreciate that Hyung-seung is a major ally. His relationship with Song-ah is over but even that past relationship threatens his new good fortune- as we saw in the elevator scene. When Hyung-seung grabbed Song-ah's hand and marched off with her that effectively put things into a different light for Hyo-joo and saved Jae-shin as well as Song-ah. Hyung-seung is now important to Jae-shin as an unwitting ally- and Jae-shin will hopefully realize this.
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isa: I'm not a serial killer I'm just really passionate about things
February 12, 2021 at 4:40 PM
Do you think Lee Jae Shin was jealous before he thought something was going on with Song-Ah right before/after she broke up with him? All of their co-workers thought something was going on between the two when he had a one-sided crush. I wouldnt be surprised of he had felt some kind of way about him if only because the coworkers obviously enjoy shipping Song-Ah and Hyung-Seung together. I think its only human if at least a tiny part of him isnt like: wait...why arent they shipping her with me?
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 5:49 PM
You are probably right that some element of jealousy was already there. That may make it harder for him to see Hyung-seung as an actual asset to him.
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7 isa: I'm not a serial killer I'm just really passionate about things
February 12, 2021 at 8:50 AM
One of the things that I just love about this drama is that they are actually allowing characters to grow. I love that Song-Ah and Hyun-Seung are becoming a part of each others lives--and they arent even dating yet. Hyun-Seung knows Song-Ahs best friend. Song-Ah went with Hyum-Seung to have drinks with his college friends.
Song-Ah was Lee Jae Shins dirty little secret. She was ready to come out of the closet and get married. She didnt have the confidence to say that she was ready to talk about marriage. She barely had the courage to spit out that she was ready to come out of the closet before he shut her down and changed the topic.
Apparently Hyun-Seung played the same role in his previous relationship. I love that before anything has even happened they are showing each other that they are allowed to to want more than what theyve been given in the past.
With Song Ah in particular I love that with hik shes confident enough to SAY WHAT SHE WANTS. Again, with LJS she was ready to come clean about dating and ready to get married and she could barely say it before he shut her down and moved on. With Hyun Seung--he told her he planned on getting over her and putting that wall up since one sided love is a form of violence (ha) and she just quietly nodded and went along with it because shes used to nodding and going along with what the other person wants. But at the end, when she told him not to get over her? To bring the wall down? Oh. Yall. I cheered for her. Shes standing up and voicing what she wants.
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 10:15 AM
That moment when he told her not to get over her was wonderful.
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 5:50 PM
I meant 'she told him' not he told her.
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sailorgirl
February 13, 2021 at 10:42 AM
@isthatacorner MY DUDE! Yes, yes, yes. Haha, I loved that scene at the end when she realizes she misses him. Also the way Hyun Seung handled the separation speaks to his maturity. He wasn't angsty or mean, just distant because the new perspective gained from meeting his ex made him realize he may have been stifling Song Ah.
At this point I just want her to be brave enough to open up and love again. I think Hyun Seung is gentle, attentive and caring enough to make it worth her while. Also, they would be so cute together.
Props to our girl for putting herself out there. I stan open communication and these two have it in spades.
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8 Blue (@mayhemf)
February 12, 2021 at 12:07 PM
I really like the growth Hyun Seung has shown, Most importantly he is a man who is willing to look inwards and question/correct his behaviour. When he chose to back off, it made me root for him more.
Also, after the initial drama, these 2 have settled into a comfortable camaraderie which is so pleasant to watch. It's almost like they both have shown their past to each other and are ok with not being perfect to each other. And Song Ah seems genuinely happy with him. After being in a relationship which only existed in the dark or within four walls, she is finally seeing the merits of meeting people/making new friends and enjoying some quality time with people. He really is showing her what 'dating' should feel like.
It made so much sense that she didn't want to let go of this new found happiness which she hasn't had in her life. Brave of her to ask him not to give up. Go girl!
Jae-woon love line is cute and they are quite adorable together. I hope they remain such and not get embroiled in some family drama later on. It's coming isn't it?
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9 OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 2:02 PM
Until it happened I had not thought that there could be any purpose to the return of Hyung-seung's ex-girlfriend but actually Misvictrix was right in seeing that it really advanced the story and his relationship with Song-ah.
His ex is wants him back- and admits to having made a mistake. True, but in the words with which Talleyrand described Napoleon's invasion of Russia "That was not a mistake, it was a blunder". But the ex trying this is not out of character because the people who make that mistake never really understand the impact on their partner. Still, her appearance does indeed make Song-ah see Hyung-seung differently.
In a way it shows just how big Hyung-seung is as a person that he decides that he will stop inflicting his love on Song-ah even o the point of waiting patiently for her. He will respect her wishes and put distance between them so that she can be comfortable at work. For once, instead of an idiotic 'noble separation' we get one rooted in common sense. How completely refreshing is that?
But, even though Hyung-seung was honestly not trying to manipulate Song-ah his move works anyway. Song-ah has finally bought a clue and tells him that she does not want him to move on from her. What a wonderful way to end the first half of this drama.
I loved the wee-cap but I have to respectfully dissent with MissVictrix about the impending marriage of Hyo-joo and Jae-shin. Yes there have been flashing red lights about that and until the most recent episode I would have agreed with this being a mistake. But in this episode all of that was overshadowed by the most massive green light possible: The fact that Hyo-joo can deal with and protect Jae-shin from his sociopathic father. Suddenly this marriage makes a lot of sense: Jae-shin has a monster removed from his life, quite literally the bane of his existence and Hyo-joo gets a husband who is a boon to the family business and the person who is least likely to put chains on her. Jae-shin needs to appreciate Hyo-joo more and perhaps hyo-joo may need to learn to be a bit softer handed in dealing with him, but there is actual potential for a very good marriage here. Jae-shin is not going to fall in love with her at this time. It may be a long time before he can love anyone but, now that his father is neutralized there is a good chance that he will eventually love himself enough to love someone else. Until now he has simply been in survival mode.
Do not get me wrong. I do not like Hyo-joo as a person. She is in fact dangerous. But as long as Jae-shin understands the importance of keeping her on his side that is actually a good thing.
That brings me to Hyung-seung's sisters. We are getting warning signals regarding the middle sister Yeon-seung. Whatever is about to happen it does not look good.
The story of Ji-seung and Jae-woon is much happier. Wedo not know what caused J-seung to cancel her engagement fourteen years ago but, given that...
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 2:08 PM
It looks like I ran out of space. so, in a nutshell, Jae-woon's approach to Ji-seung actually is the only one that can work, precisely because it is the one that can work. Ji-seung was one burned very badly. Jae-woon's buffoonlike approach works because it makes Ji-seung feel safe and that is why her walls are crumbling.
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isa: I'm not a serial killer I'm just really passionate about things
February 12, 2021 at 4:47 PM
I agree with what youve said about all of our characters. But heres a question. Why do you think Lee Jae Shin fell for/ started going out with Song-Ah to begin with? Hes obviously not been honest with her and youve pointed out clearly that she cant protect him, she cant advance him in society/at work he doesnt love himself so he couldnt have loved her. Was he faking love with her? Do you think he THOUGHT he was in love with her? She seems more the type that he would have ended up with if he never sold himself--is he with her for sex and familiarity?
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OldLawyer
February 12, 2021 at 6:02 PM
It is very clear that Jae-shin genuinely thought that he was in love with Song-ah. But it is easy to be mistaken if you are in Jae-shin's shoes because Jae-shin has absolutely no idea what love is. This is the tragedy of his life to this point. But what she gave him was comfort, etc- she was essentially his escape from the reality of his existence. So his feelings towards her were certainly positive but they were never love.
If they had married it would have ended badly because of the problem of his father. And in the absence of Hyo-joo that no doubt would have happened. For all that Hyo-joo is unlikeable, selfish and at times nasty the fact is that she is actually rescuing both Jae-shin and Song-ah. Song-ah will never know this but it is to be hoped that, in time Jae-shin will. In fact, this finally gives Jae-shin a chance to learn to love himself and in time others. But it has to begin with his letting go of the victim mentality.
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Blue (@mayhemf)
February 12, 2021 at 6:22 PM
I think it was the first time he met someone who did not use his 'family background' to taunt him. Even when she overheard the conversation, she did not talk about it and did not gossip nor spread any rumors. Her respect for him as a BM remained the same.
I think he found someone who he could trust with his secrets/feelings etc. I do think he like did like her. May be not love. And in some way, they both connected because of a toxic parent.
To him, she was the one person who knew him and understood him. So may be he thought she would 'understand' his arranged marriage too!! who knows!
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10 owl 🦉 🫰
February 12, 2021 at 4:35 PM
I just like this drama, it has many relationship complications that draw me in to see how they are resolved, change, or even explode. Hyun-Seung is my ideal type (a term I never used before kdramas haha). Two looming issues - the wedding dress having to be ready on time and the assignment to Europe - have me nervous s to how they will play out . I really like the dynamics of the Chae siblings. And , while the first two episodes threw us into the relationships conflict, I do like the pace of Hyun-Seung and Song-ah’s interactions.
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11 chloeday
February 12, 2021 at 10:37 PM
Great job describing Jae-woon's antics as buffoonery! His fear of dogs (especially the tiny, yappy dog) was hilarious. I wonder what his reaction will be when he discovers Ji-seung's shop stopped making Hyo-joo's wedding dress though. Jae-woon is likable with Ji-seung, but with Jae-shin, Jae-woon is insensitive and rude. It's difficult to see who he truly is.
As for our main couple, their romance is developed very naturally, which I deeply appreciate. It's slow, but I think because the workplace environment is very fun, it takes away the frustration viewers usually have with slow romances.
This is one of the two dramas I am currently watching, and I enjoy every minute of it!
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12 Kurama
February 13, 2021 at 1:47 PM
After reading the comments on What are we watching, I realized a lot of people didn't like the trope of the ex.
Personally, I liked it because it didn't shake the lead's feelings. Hyun Seung didn't hesitate or had doubts and Song-A didn't become jealous. Any of them started to act out of place because of the ex.
But it was a good parallel with other characters. She broke up with him because he didn't share the same difficulties. Song-A and Jae-Shin shared the same kind of past and I think it's why they were attracted to each other. A difficult past they could overcome thanks to their hard work. But they lived their love story in secret.
I don't think Song-A will do the same mistake than the ex by understimating Hyun-Seung's love and care and taking it for granted.
The ex let Hyun-Seung realized that unrequited love can be burdensome. So he tried to act in consequence.
For once, the ex trope made the plot going forward and not backward.
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13 kd66
February 13, 2021 at 2:29 PM
I am going to be little unpopular here also... I just don't find the main couple swoony at all. I know I am supposed to think the main lead's overwhelming attention to our leading lady is supposed to be romantic and all but I just get stalker vibes. And if one office-romance gone south is going to lead to work complications, why start a second? Jae-shin, while definitely a flawed character, is the most interesting. While I don't condone his behavior, the whole set up just seems off with her just cutting him off, no major blow-up, too many episodes for her to hear what happened, and no real conversation between the two. If I understand the history correctly, they dated for two years and they knew each other's history. So it doesn't seem like it was just an office tryst. All the more reason for our heroine's anger but also more reason for the plot to deal with this better. And also more reason why the new guy's (our hero) overwhelming attention seems out of place.
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14 Dramas found by chance
February 14, 2021 at 6:36 AM
Hyun-seung’s reaction to his ex — to re-evaluate his relationship with Somg-ah — made sense to me. Although he has been respectful of Song-ah's choices in principle, I have felt the vibe of "I totally support your choices but I'll get in your face every 5 minutes to remind you there is an alternative, not to mention turning up to save you/surprise you every time something happens." I'm not surprised he feels like he's been sitting on both sides of the fence.
In the bigger sweep, he always has good reasons for what he does but he still comes across to me as impulsive and close to being out of control, even though he may not always realise it.
I really like this drama.
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