It’s Okay, It’s Love: Episode 9

by gummimochi

It’s an episode of breakthroughs for everyone apart from our hero, who’s still having difficulty discerning his reality from actual reality. Our new couple learns that a relationship is much more than kisses, checking in with each other via the occasional one-minute phone calls, and being cool with the ex-boyfriend who keeps hanging around the place. With differing opinions on how lingering relationships can affect present ones, these two will have a long way to go if they’re going to see this to the end.

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EPISODE 9 RECAP

Jae-yeol wipes the tears and beads of sweat away from Hae-soo’s face until she stirs awake. There are tears in his eyes too, which he explains is because she was crying in her sleep. Seeing as they’re both dressed, one wonders if they slept together after all.

As they lay there, Hae-soo examines the numerous scars on his body. He doesn’t know where they’re from, and she tells him not to get hurt. He does confirm that he loves her, words which Hae-soo doesn’t believe. Plus, she’s not at that point yet.

He says that’s okay, since she will love him in the end. When asked why she was crying, Hae-soo nestles into his chest, saying that she thought of something. But she’ll tell him what it was much later, “When I truly come to love you, I’ll tell you then. What I thought of today. And I’ll also tell you just how selfish and awful a person I really am.”

If he still says he loves her then, she’ll believe that he loves her. Jae-yeol plants a kiss on her head—he still loves her, regardless. We then get the answer to our question when Hae-soo tells him not to mistake himself in thinking that he has all of her just because they slept together once.

Jae-yeol replies he wouldn’t think that. Satisfied with that answer, Hae-soo curls up closer to him to catch a few winks. Jae-yeol writes quietly while she sleeps, even shushing the nearby crab.

Just before dawn, Jae-yeol wakes with the start after seeing imaginary Kang-woo involved in a car accident. But he isn’t fully awake either, as he dreams of big bro Jae-bum stabbing him in the gut repeatedly. Good god, don’t tell me you’re stabbing yourself this time, Jae-yeol!

Dream Jae-bum says Mama Ok-ja would be saddened by Jae-yeol’s death. We see another glimpse into the past where Mama Ok-ja had lit some rolled-up paper. In the present, Jae-yeol struggles against the pain until he wakes on the beach, but he still sees the bleeding wound. I can’t imagine that there was anything sharp nearby for Jae-yeol to hurt himself, but the threat of self-harm is seriously alarming.

But Hae-soo awakes in time for see Jae-yeol eke out: “My… stomach. It’s bleeding.” She grabs his face, asking if he had a nightmare. It’s because she doesn’t see what he sees—the bleeding—which disappears from sight moments later.

He’s still gripped with terror though as he replies haltingly that Kang-woo was in an accident and that Jae-bum stabbed him. Hae-soo pulls him into an embrace, apologizing profusely that she forgot that he can only sleep peacefully in a bathtub.

She helps him regulate his breathing, and it takes him a minute to even catch his breath. Once he does, he insists that he’s fine now, but Hae-soo insists that they wait until he calms down.

And while Jae-yeol would love to do that, but he says there are people coming. She says there isn’t anyone around, but there are voices nearby, and they make a haste but quiet getaway.

Back at the hotel, Hae-soo prepares the bathtub for Jae-yeol to sleep in. He jokes that it’s probably not attractive to see him crouched in a tub, and if they have to break up because of it, then so be it.

She tucks him in and says she got plenty of rest herself—now it’s her turn to put him to sleep. Drowsy, Jae-yeol mutters that he thinks he shouldn’t break up with her because he finds her so comfortable to be around. He takes her hand, which she places over his and pats him comfortingly until he falls asleep.

Hae-soo’s unni worries whether Jae-yeol’s someone she can trust to be alone with her sister, let alone a romantic getaway. She’s afraid that Hae-soo might end up hurting, but Sunbae Jo assures her that in Hae-soo’s case, love is either about creating memories or something to be celebrated.

Sunbae Jo finally gets through to his ex-wife Doctor Lee, who says he was right about her sister’s marriage situation and her own countertransference issue. Sunbae Jo doesn’t rub it in and asks about the course of action instead. Her sister and husband will get couple’s therapy, and when Sunbae Jo suggests they meet up, Doctor Lee takes a raincheck.

The ongoing argument behind Sunbae Jo has reached screaming levels by now, mostly on So-nyeo’s part. Having heard enough of this petty bickering, Sunbae Jo tells Soo-kwang to buy her everything she wants so that he can get rid of his lingering feelings once and for all. Soo-kwang gives in.

As they walk along the beach, Hae-soo suggests that Jae-yeol pursue treatment for his OCD symptoms. Conflict of interest prevents her from treating him herself, which he jokes if that means she can’t be objective because she likes him so much.

She pulls her hand out of his in a huff, then asks why he doesn’t get upset whenever she calls him a player. She scoffs when he says she’s entitled to her own opinion—so is he saying that he isn’t one when she saw him looking at that stylist’s chest the day they first met or sneaking glances at the pretty women here?

To her surprise, Jae-yeol admits to doing so in his usual matter-of-fact tone, adding that he thought to himself how Hae-soo’s much better than all of those women. Although amused, she asks if he’s comparing her to other women. He doesn’t see anything wrong with it, and he hopes that she does the same with him. Because then she’ll see just how great he is.

Again, Hae-soo asks if he loves her, and when he says yes, she wonders if he’s saying those words too soon and tosses them out too lightly. So Jae-yeol asks when she thinks would be an appropriate time for him to say those three words—if she’s saying it isn’t okay for him to say that he loves her after kissing one another and having slept together, then when?

She just says it’s all too fast, and Jae-yeol accepts that: “Fine, I don’t love you now then.” Hilariously, Hae-soo finds the idea that he doesn’t love her right now off-putting. You can’t have it both ways, dear.

Jae-yeol declines the suggestion to seek psychological treatment and says Kang-woo will meet them at the airport. Hae-soo declares that she’s going to come back here to Okinawa and go on a trip around the world next year.

She asks if he’s going to dictate whether she can go or not just because they’re an item, but Jae-yeol encourages the idea. He likes the idea of her going to various places and meeting all kinds of people to help her patients, but she refuses the idea of them going together. He spends too much money, she explains. Amused, he plants another kiss on her lips, to her displeasure.

Soo-kwang buys So-nyeo a new pair of kicks and isn’t keen on the idea of dating when she’s seeing another guy. He accidentally runs into an ajusshi carrying cardboard, who keeps his head down and whom So-nyeo scowls at. Oh, is he her father?

Soo-kwang tells her that she shouldn’t look down on her father, raising a hand when she asks why she shouldn’t. When Motorcycle Dude arrives just then, Soo-kwang tells So-nyeo that his feelings for her this past year were sincere. He knew he shouldn’t like a minor, so he dated other women to try and forget her.

But this is where it ends, Soo-kwang declares, and he gives her the cash in his wallet that represent what’s left of his feelings. So-nyeo snaps at him as he leaves—what does she care if he leaves her? Her mother did the same to her, anyway.

Now back in Korea, Jae-yeol sighs that he didn’t get much headway into his work on the plane. Hae-soo says he can have an off-day, but it rather seems like Jae-yeol’s having a few off-months.

Hae-soo gapes when she’s told to head home alone. It’s because Jae-yeol’s worried that Kang-woo’s not answering his calls (…because he isn’t real), and she says if it’s because of that dream. Didn’t Kang-woo call him earlier today?

He leaves her there while he runs into the road and nearly gets hit by oncoming traffic. Now I’m thinking he’s going to end up in that car accident. He finds Kang-woo in the parking lot, where the latter huffs that he’s been waiting.

Kang-woo is surprised to hear that Hae-soo’s left already, though he lights up that it’s because Jae-yeol wanted to check up on him. “You’re the only person I have in this world,” Kang-woo asserts. Oh, how true that is.

Kang-woo hands over his newest manuscript (entitled “A Youth’s Rainshower”), adding that the contents isn’t as sappy as the title. Jae-yeol asks after Kang-woo’s mother, but Kang-woo is interested in whether Jae-yeol slept with his girlfriend or not instead.

Hae-soo and Jae-yeol arrive home to see a tear-filled Soo-kwang singing his broken heart out. But the mood quickly turns tense when Hae-soo refuses to be So-nyeo’s therapist and teach her about sex education. She tells Sunbae Jo to do it instead, but he argues that he has no rapport with the young delinquent.

When Hae-soo says Jae-yeol can do it instead, Sunbae Jo hollers how he wouldn’t work out either. Soo-kwang finally speaks up, saying that while he broke up with So-nyeo, he couldn’t help but feel a tinge of pain at hearing how her mother abandoned her.

He wants to make sure that So-nyeo has a woman to talk to, but Hae-soo argues that you can find everything on the internet. Sunbae Jo scolds her for that, reminding her of her own words when she moved into this house. “We’d create a world where people can trust and learn to lean on one another. We agreed that most mental illnesses are due to an inability of effective communication, so we’ll have open communication!”

Jae-yeol rises to Hae-soo’s defense, but she says there’s no need taking sides. She’ll accept that she’s cold and ruthless, then leaves. Sunbae Jo laughs when Jae-yeol keeps speaking on her behalf, and assures Soo-kwang that they just need to prod Hae-soo some more to get her onboard.

“Just like how she fell for this one,” he says, nodding at Jae-yeol. Once Sunbae Jo leaves, Soo-kwang asks if Jae-yeol and Hae-soo actually slept together, which Jae-yeol takes as his cue to leave.

On the way to visit Jae-bum, Tae-yong takes another call from the police about Jae-yeol. He tells Mama Ok-ja that doesn’t really know why Jae-yeol was hanging around his old neighborhood, but he lost his wallet there.

Even stranger still, the police officers review the CCTV footage to see Jae-yeol fighting with no one but himself.

Jae-yeol is still suffering from writer’s block at home, so he takes a gander at Kang-woo’s manuscript. Hae-soo calls just then, wondering why he hasn’t checked in. He explains that he prefers not to make calls while he’s working, and assumed she’d wanted the same.

Jae-yeol walks downstairs to answer the door during this call, then pointedly says her name before hanging up just as PD Choi walk through the door. PD Choi says he’s just waiting for Sunbae Jo to wrap up his therapy session, and Jae-yeol has to fight the urge to punch him.

While PD Choi does an internet search on Jae-yeol and reads an article about Jae-bum with interest, Mama Ok-ja and Tae-yong are told that Jae-bum doesn’t want to see anyone apart from Sunbae Jo. She hands the officer another book to deliver to her son.

It’s one of Mama Ok-ja’s poems that Jae-bum reads in his cell:

I could have lived in a beautiful world
so why must I take the path that can’t be found on a map?
How long must I continue to live in this misery?
There was only one thought on my mind?
What can I do so that I may live a normal life?

We’re then taken back to the night Jae-bum and Jae-yeol’s stepfather was killed: Mama Ok-ja had seen Jae-bum remove the knife from the man’s chest. As she clutched her unconscious younger son in her arms, she looked back at Jae-bum in horror. “Jae-yeol… stabbed him,” Jae-bum explained apprehensively.

In the present, Mama Ok-ja discovers a note from Jae-bum in the book she received. “Why didn’t you believe me?” Jae-bum writes. “Jae-yeol was the one who killed him. Wait and see what the son you abandoned will do to the son you love.”

As Mama Ok-ja tries to catch her breath, Jae-bum builds upon his rose made out of his food, then chucks the book in frustration. She answers a call from Jae-yeol, who says he just wanted her to listen to this song.

Over at the hospital, Doctor Lee and Hae-soo drill the residents through their latest case: a couple in their fifties with shared psychotic disorder, believing that their home has a cockroach infestation for months. Doctor Lee gives Hae-soo a heads up that the husband might be schizophrenic.

Hae-soo apologizes to Doctor Lee about her behavior towards her about Sunbae Jo the other day. But Doctor Lee has done some self-reflection over the weekend and realized that what she felt for her ex-husband was more guilt than love.

Sunbae Jo had wanted a child right away, and she’d secretly gone on birth control despite agreeing with the idea. She believed that having a child would negatively affect her career, but she was found out and feigned ignorance. But even though Sunbae Jo was astute enough to recognize that, he didn’t talk to her after that.

“I think I should apologize to him about that,” Doctor Lee says. She realizes that it’s her fault that their marriage fell apart, and she’ll remain as his friend.

Now that they’re sharing secrets, Hae-soo has one of her own to tell: “I slept with Jang Jae-yeol.” Rather than Hae-soo’s anxiety symptoms, Doctor Lee is more interested about whether Hae-soo thought of her mother when she kissed Jae-yeol.

Hae-soo starts to well up with tears at that. Oh, so did she? Doctor Lee is sympathetic to her tears, and Hae-soo admits that yes, she thought of her mother and Ajusshi Kim. But those disgusted thoughts of her mother whom she thought looked hideous actually looked beautiful to her that night in Okinawa.

In a breaking voice, Hae-soo says she realized how her mother’s only solace from taking care of a handicapped husband and children was with her relationship to Ajusshi Kim. “I couldn’t help but think how lonely she must have felt.”

Doctor Lee celebrates this emotional breakthrough, and says that everyone is living their lives for the first time, so they can make mistakes instead of being confined by what certain societal roles should look like.

Hae-soo says there’s something else she needs to confess, but it has to be to Jae-yeol. When asked if she thinks Jae-yeol is her soulmate, Hae-soo laughs, “Probably.” Doctor Lee jokes that Hae-soo might get married at this rate, and Hae-soo smiles that she likes living alone.

Hae-soo calls up So-nyeo after receiving another nudging text from Soo-kwang, much to his delight. The ladies meet in Hae-soo’s family restaurant, where So-nyeo remarks that her family must do well for themselves.

Hae-soo immediately corrects that notion—their family is deep in debt thanks to her tuition and the loan to start up this business. Her family used to work insane hours trying to make ends meet, though they all still work hard today. Including her disabled father who cares for them in his own way.

So-nyeo gets right to the point about why they’re talking, then explains that she’s learned all she needs to know about sex ed thanks to the internet. It turns out So-nyeo is quite knowledgeable since she has great interest in the subject, and thanks Hae-soo for the meal before leaving.

Mom hilariously holds up a picture of Hae-soo from Okinawa (sent by Jae-yeol, presumably) to show her husband, unaware that her daughter’s inside. Hae-soo catches her mother but doesn’t get angry; instead she expresses how she doesn’t like that Mom and Jae-yeol have been in contact behind her back.

PD Choi is still hanging around the house when Hae-soo arrives home that evening, much to her annoyance. She barges into Jae-yeol’s room while he’s writing to ask how he feels about her ex-boyfriends coming around the house. But Jae-yeol is in no mood to have this conversation now since he’s working, and Hae-soo slams the door behind her.

Meanwhile, Sunbae Jo excludes Jae-bum’s case for PD Choi’s show—why would they need an adult if they’re focusing on juvenile delinquents being released back into society? Sunbae Jo hones in to the idea that PD Choi is interested because Jae-yeol and Jae-bum are siblings, something PD Choi doesn’t deny.

Sunbae Jo calls the prison looking to administer a sodium amytal interview with Jae-bum, only to be told that it’s been performed before.

Hae-soo gets further annoyed when her housemates don’t have much of a problem about PD Choi hanging around either, so by the time Jae-yeol approaches her for a chat, she tells him to go and write. “How can I write in this mood?!” Jae-yeol roars back. Whoa.

She asks how she must feel right now then, unsatisfied with his short “I have to write” explanation. Concluding that they know too little about each other, she wonders if they should be together at all.

Sunbae Jo and Soo-kwang tell the lovebirds to take their argument somewhere else, to which Hae-soo clarifies that she’s currently fighting with all three men in this house. Sunbae Jo doesn’t see what’s so wrong if Hae-soo didn’t love her ex-boyfriend, anyway.

Soo-kwang jumps on that bandwagon, and notes that Hae-soo used her ex-boyfriend to keep him at bay due to her anxiety issues. At the mention of an amicable breakup, Hae-soo asks if that’s what happened between Sunbae Jo and his ex-wife.

She’s not at all afraid to be cursed at later because she’d cut off any lingering ties rather than mislead someone and hurt them later on. She tells Soo-kwang that she won’t be seeing So-nyeo anymore either.

Sunbae Jo takes his frustration and anger towards Hae-soo out on Jae-yeol before storming off. Soo-kwang moseys over to the kitchen and encourages Jae-yeol to confide in him—dating Hae-soo’s hard, isn’t it? “It is,” Jae-yeol admits.

When Jae-yeol heads upstairs, Hae-soo parrots back his motto that he gives as good as he gets. So should she accept it if one of his exes dropped by the house? Jae-yeol replies that he held back his jealousy because he wanted to hear PD Choi call her a good person.

Hae-soo makes it perfectly clear that she isn’t going to be as nice to his ex-girlfriends, and Jae-yeol cuts her off with a kiss. Neither of them are angry with each other anymore, and Hae-soo suggests that he hang a sign outside his room when he’s working—that way, she won’t interrupt him.

“I’ll be moving out soon enough,” Jae-yeol answers, adding that the construction by his old place is nearly complete. Hae-soo: “What? You’re moving?” Jae-yeol: “Yeah, I’m moving.”

 
COMMENTS

Funnily enough, I’d gotten so used to Jae-yeol’s presence in this house that I forgot that this was a temporary living situation for him. We know that he’s been having trouble writing lately, what with being in a new relationship and all the drama that happens both in and outside the house. It’s interesting that his creative juices haven’t been flowing that well for him as of late, and rather than guess why, I’ll let the show take its time to explain that answer in due course.

Speaking of answers, I’ll admit that I was a bit surprised by how Hae-soo managed to keep her anxiety and previously mentioned fear of physical intimacy in check during sexy times with Jae-yeol. All series long, we’d been told of how her anxiety issues were a huge obstacle that impeded her love life for years, so it felt like pretty rapid character development to see her defensive walls being brought down so quickly within a few short weeks of a new relationship and a few days in Okinawa. Could one hope that the show has more to speak upon than the constant emphasis of various sexual topics that come in and out like a revolving door in every episode?

Furthermore, Hae-soo’s estranged relationship with her mother has been an ongoing conflict in this show. Her emotional trauma from witnessing her mother kissing another man planted that seed of anxiety and fear, and while I’m all for Hae-soo to reconcile with her mother, her own emotional breakthrough came as a result from her own sexual awakening. In that vein, I wish that Hae-soo had been able to understand her mother a little better apart from one sensual experience. I’m hoping that the reconciliation between mother and daughter is an ongoing journey, one that involves Hae-soo and her mother more than the influence of Hae-soo’s relationship with Jae-yeol.

Now that we’re past the halfway point, we’re seeing more cracks in Jae-yeol’s mental instability as well. His psychological state has always been a concern from the start, but it tipped the frightening point once we found that Jae-yeol could imagine people other than Kang-woo and hurt himself. Simply put, the glimpses into Jae-yeol’s nightmares are alarming, and now we know that his subconscious dreams can cross over to brief conscious hallucinations. And while we’re talking about hallucinations, I keep wondering just how Jae-yeol keeps receiving manuscripts from someone who doesn’t exist. At this point, there are barely any clues that give us a solid lead, and right now, Jae-yeol is more concerned about Kang-woo’s well-being than his writing.

We’re slowly gathering clues as to what happened on that fateful night of the stepfather’s death, now that we have Mama Ok-ja’s perspective as well. Unfortunately it doesn’t tell us much more than we already know thus far, and now I’m curious about what information that previous truth serum interview will hold. Someone has to be telling the truth somewhere, so it’s just a matter of time until we find out who is.

 
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